


Demencia and Cherri Bomb's Violent Vacation to Panau

by Milo_F_Waters



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series), Just Cause (Video Games), Villainous (Cartoon)
Genre: Blood, Crack, Crossover, Explicit Language, Explosions, Guns
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-12-18
Packaged: 2020-01-05 08:27:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 31,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18362306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Milo_F_Waters/pseuds/Milo_F_Waters
Summary: Black Hat has concocted his most diabolical product yet - a literal portal to Hell! When he ends up summoning an explosive she-demon named Cherri Bomb, though, things go south pretty fast. Especially when she starts hitting on Black Hat in front of Demencia…





	1. A Match Made in Hell

**Author's Note:**

> Well, now I've lost it. I teamed up a violent, psychopathic lizard girl with a violent, psychopathic demoness to rampage through Just Cause 2 - one of the most insane, over-the-top action games ever made. I think even Michael Bay would be hesitant to go this far. Well, enjoy the fruits of my insane labor!

Our story of chaos and destruction begins as many do: a retired villain selling his wares on the dark web equivalent of QVC.

“Greetings, all you soon-to-be slaves, Black Hat is here to entice you with yet another product to satisfy your diabolical needs! Today we have the perfect thing for all who dabble in the dark arts: The Black Hat Hell Portal!”

The device was a mixture of arcane and technological with a two-foot wide ring of metal cables carefully engraved with runes and symbols from dozens of languages. Surrounding it was a wider ring of beads, jars, and various knickknacks borrowed from dozens of cultures, apparently made as a barrier to contain the otherworldly creature they summoned. Beyond that was Dr. Flug at an ordinary control console with Demencia and 5.0.5 watching in the background.

“So Flug, what horrendous creature will you be bringing forth from the fiery abyss?” asked a smarmy Black Hat.

“Well, since this is still our first run, I am planning on summoning a low-level threat with minor combat capabilities and-”

“WHAT? I want an agent of chaos and destruction, not a haunted house attraction!”

Before Black Hat could chew out the doctor further, the portal was opened as a swirling red cloud emerged from inside the cables. All of the Black Hat Organization looked in interest, except for an already whimpering 5.0.5, until four arms sprouted from the vortex. The arms eventually grabbed the edge of the portal and pulled the rest of the demon forth; a white-colored creature dressed in a striped-top and a pair of enormous boots. Outside of the apparent gender confusion due to the conspicuous bulge on its chest, its eyes were mismatch and had a mouth full of sharpened teeth.

“Well…it worked at least,” commented Flug.

The four-armed demon did not speak for several minutes, simply observing the situation with its hands on its hips until it broke into a relaxed smile.

“Okay then, it’s been a while since I’ve done this in the living world, but I’ll give it a shot. Which one of you is the director?”

“That would be me, Black Hat, your new master!”

“Ooh, a BDSM shoot! Now you’re speaking my language! Gotta admit the set’s a bit shitty though, but I can make it work. Now who’s my co-star?”

“C-C-Co-star?” stammered Flug, already not liking where this was going. His feeling got worse when the demon sashayed over to him and placed two hands around his waist.

“Oh my, I haven’t seen such a perfect sub in a long time! What’s your stage name, scrawny-stud?”

“D-D-D-D-Dr. Flug?”

“Well, ‘doctor,’ I think this time you’ll be the one getting serviced…” the demon chortled naughtily, causing Demencia to burst into laughter. 5.0.5 just tilted his head in confusion. He never would have guessed the doctor was sick.

“Silence, you androgynous fool!” commanded Black Hat, “This is a lair of villainy, not a movie set! You are here to be my servant of chaos and advertise my product-line!”

“Okay, Mr. Over-Compensation,” scoffed the demon, “Let me get a few things straight. My name is Angel Dust and I am, in fact, male...Although I can understand the confusion,” chortled the demon, apparently named Angel, as he hoisted up the tuft on his chest to make it look even bigger.

“And sorry, but I don’t do that whole wreaking havoc shit. I am a Wholesale-Housecalling-Oral-Rectal-Expert, or whore, whichever you prefer. So, if you want a fantastic time in bed or the best way to do lines of coke, give me a call.”

“FLUUUUUUUUUUUG! You summoned a demonic prostitute?!”

“Prostitute, adult actor, and expert connoisseur of illegal drugs, thank you very much,” bowed Angel dramatically, “And while it’s not my style to give away things for free, I might know someone who’s more what you’re looking for.”

“You mean a violent, corrupt demon who can act as a loyal servant that annihilates any enemy in front of them?”

“Suuuuuuuuure, let’s go with that.” 

Angel then whispered into Black Hat’s ear about his friend, with every detail getting the enterprising mastermind more excited. Dr. Flug then sent him back to Hell with him muttering about how someone named Charlie better be impressed with his “good behavior.” Black Hat then commanded the sniveling doctor to put in a more specific instructions to summon the demon Angel suggested. Within a few seconds the portal was opened again and this time something literally flew out of the red cloud and smacked onto the lab floor.

“OW! What the fuck-?! If that pencil-dicked snake bitch did this, I’m gonna castrate him twice!” cursed the new demon as she stood up.

This demon, clearly female judging from the large cleavage protruding out of her skimpy top and shapely legs contained in tattered black jeans, was much more what Black Hat had in mind. Her face was dominated by a massive blood-red eye with an x in place of any pupil and a set of fanged teeth grinning with malice. She was already holding a small, bright-red bomb and gave off the aura of someone who liked to pick fights for fun and reveled in carnage. Black Hat was very pleased with this one.

“Greetings, hell-spawn! You have been summoned to do my bidding! And-”

Before he could finish his monologue, the demoness was already laughing her head off while rolling on the floor. She even lost her grip on her bomb which proceeded to roll away and destroy a nearby table of mechanical doodads. 

“Okay, okay, back the truck up, Mr. Shortdick,” stammered the she-demon as she got back to her feet. “One, my name is Cherri Bomb. Two, I am nobody’s servant unless you’ve got ass, cash, or grass for me. And three, I was in the middle of a very important turf war with a certain twat before you dragged me to your shitty science-experiment. So you can either send me back home right now, or I can show you why I’m such a big deal firsthand!”

The sharply-dressed entrepreneur felt he had to respect her moxie to an extent, but was otherwise unimpressed by her defiance. To prove his point, he forced her to release the bomb she had pulled out of seemingly nowhere and levitated it up to his face. Before anyone could blink, he chomped down the munition and barely flinched as the bomb detonated in his mouth sending flesh and teeth everywhere. In only seconds his face reformed into his usual sneer.

“Now that I’ve established your little fireworks can’t hurt me, you can either comply with my wishes or I can show you torment and agony that will make the ninth circle of your home look pleasant!”

Cherri unconsciously pulled out another bomb and walked up to him. She lit the fuse with a thought and rolled it around her hands until she was steps away from Black Hat.

“No one. Talks to me. Like that. Ever,” she growled as she got into his face. Her single red eye stared into his unblinking visage. She held the round bomb right between their faces and he did not even flinch. All he did was blow out the fuse with his breath. Cherri dropped the now-extinguished explosive and grinned lustfully.

“Fuck me, that’s hot,” she exclaimed as she suddenly kissed him, much to Black Hat’s surprise. 

This did not last long, though, as a now enraged Demencia charged the enamored she demon. After literally ripping her off of Black Hat, she proceeded to pull out her signature mace from out of nowhere and bludgeon Cherri Bomb’s head into a fine red paste before taking a bite out of her leg and shouting numerous profanities in remarkably fluent Spanish. 5.0.5 was left quivering in the corner while Flug and Black Hat watched the display in disbelief. Then Black Hat quickly realized his demon puppet’s skull was now a pile of cranberry sauce on the floor.

“DEMENCIAAAAAAAAAAAA! Look what you’ve done! This is the last straw, I want you out of my lair this instant!”

Before Demencia could either plead for forgiveness or assuage his anger, all four of the villains noticed Cherri’s remains began to move. Her head was reforming right before their eyes! After her entire skull was mended and her brain recomposed from sludge she opened her eye and smirked, looking no worse for wear.

“Ha, is that all you’ve got?!” she taunted at Demencia, making the lizard-girl froth at the mouth, “I can’t die in the mortal world, you dumb bitch!”

Demencia’s rage overrode all reason as she slithered towards the demoness. Before she could reach her, though, Cherri ran towards her with two lit bombs in her hands and sent them both flying at her. The incensed reptile-girl managed to knock them both back towards the thrower, but this barely slowed Cherri down as any damage the explosions did to her was already healing. The two eventually devolved into a fist-fight with Demencia fighting with all her might while Cherri doled out two punches for every one she took and quickly healed off. 

“Come on, you must want me to bang your boss if you fight like this!” goaded Cherri, having more fun than she had in years. Demencia literally growled at her and threw her back towards the portal.

“The only one who’s going to make passionate and uncontrollable love to the vilest man in the universe is ME, you tramped-up shit-eating freak-show cunt!” 

As she finished her taunt, she ran to the control console of the portal and started randomly pressing buttons and slamming in commands in the hope it would either send Cherri back to Hell or destroy her in the process. Instead the portal began sparking erratically as red energy began to fill the room. Before Flug could chastise Demencia for her recklessness, a flash of red energy blinded everyone. When the light died down the portal itself and both the feuding psychotic females were gone without a trace.

“Well…good thing I have a spare in the back?” questioned Flug in the vain hope that it would quell Black Hat’s apparent anger that his latest demonstration had, quite possibly literally, gone to Hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I am already having a blast writing this. Hope you all enjoyed this too!


	2. Welcome to Panau

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now it's time...for MORE INSANITY!

Even as the Cherri Bomb and Demencia were teleported away to even God does not know where, they never stopped their catfight. The two spent the entire trip grappling and beating each other with the demoness still not being fazed while Demencia started slowing down after about a dozen blows to the head. 

When they finally exited the bizarre energy stream, the two found themselves rolling down a snowy mountainside until they came to a stop several dozen feet at the bottom. The portal ended up stuck in several feet of snow. 

Once they finally came to a stop, Cherri looked up at the now open night sky and took a moment to realize she had not seen snow in decades. Demencia was too busy trying to noisily gnaw Cherri’s arm off to no avail to notice the change in scenery.

Their little feud was brought to an end by a white-camouflaged jeep driving up to them from a nearby road. From the vehicle emerged two emotionless goons carrying submachine guns on their belts and wearing bright-red vests and snow-covered hats.

“You two, this private government property! Come with us or we’ll shoot!” spoke one of the grunts in a heavy Asian accent. Cherri backhanded the still-biting Demencia and rolled her eye at the duo. She noticed they weren’t the least bit put off by her demonic appearance which either meant they were very brave, very stupid, or very much partaking in some PCP which Cherri could go for right now.

The she-demon walked towards them as they pointed their guns at her, finally getting Demencia’s mind away from turning Cherri’s skull into a novelty mug as a tribute to Black Hat.

“Don’t move another step!” commanded the other grunt, causing Cherri to chuckle. Before the two could pull the trigger, she stepped towards them with her inhuman speed and punched one in the chest hard enough to send her fist through his torso. He literally dropped dead with his weapon fully loaded as Cherri yanked out her hand and blood came rushing out of the large wound. His companion was now shaking in his boots and making the snow under his feet yellow, but he still did not waver. 

“Damn, I never knew humans were so fragile…” she giggled to herself as she imagined all the fun she could have at this point with this combined with being more-or-less indestructible in the mortal world.

The remaining soldier, however, was far less amused and opened fire on her. Even as she was peppered with bullets, though, she barely reacted. Demencia, however, decided she wanted to have fun too. She proceeded to pick up the fallen soldier’s SMG and fire around twenty rounds or so into his legs causing to fall backwards into the snow as his lower half become two geysers of blood.

“Okay, now I feel better!” remarked the demented minion as she then picked up the barely-alive soldier and literally threw him into the back of the vehicle he drove up in by smashing him through the rear-view window. She then turned on the ignition and simply let the car roll down the mountainside, crashing over multiple snowbanks until it hit a large rock and went up in a fiery explosion.

“Wow, that was brutal even by my standards,” commented Cherri, begrudgingly impressed with the redhead’s creative execution.

“Thanks! I once killed an intruder in Black Hat’s lair by sending him through a wall back outside, then used the stones to smash his skull open! Did you know brains really are pink? Cartoons have enlightened me!”

Cherri had to laugh at her. When she was not being an obsessive stalker, this girl could be absurdly funny. That’s when Cherri got a very, very twisted idea.

“Saaaay, I have a hunch this island could be a lot of fun. What do you think about finding more uptight military goons and ripping them a new one?”

“Can I use this anvil?” asked Demencia, who was suddenly holding the massive metal tool in her hands.

“Why?”

“Because my Roadrunner gospel teachings demand it!” she exclaimed as she knelt in the snow and kowtowed to her animated gods, banging her head on the anvil in reverence.

“Oh yeah, this is gonna be a riot…” Cherri giggled to herself in anticipation, before remembering one crucial detail: 

Demencia was still a human. A very, very deranged and potentially lethal human, but still flesh and bone. Thus, she was still subject to the many pesky inconveniences of life like hunger, disease, permanent bodily harm and menstrual cycles. The one-eyed maniac pondered what to do until she conveniently remembered the device they brought with them on their trip. Her already fiendish expression got even worse as a great, yet terrible idea came to her.

“Oooh, that’s a plotting-evil-stuff face! I get those after eating enough sugar sticks and watching violent anime! What’s your plan? What’s your plan?!”

“I know the perfect way to make you into the perfect partner for island-trashing.”

Demencia literally squeed with excitement. “What’s the plan? Do you need an anvil? Booze? A gallon of Flug’s blood?”

“No, tempting but no, and what-the-fuck. No, this plan is VERY simple…” She picked up the other fallen submachine gun and pointed at Demencia.

“Step one: You go to Hell.”

And with that cheery sendoff Cherri loaded dozens of rounds into the lizard girl who, while many things, was far from bulletproof. At least two bullets pierced her brain and many, many more tore up her internal organs rendering the hyperactive stalker completely calm for the first time in years as blood oozed out from dozens of holes.

“Step two,” spoke Cherri with no concern for the first-degree murder she just committed, “Get your ass back here.”

It only took Cherri a minute to drag the metal portal off the snow-covered mountainside to relatively flat ground. It seemed Cherri really did not know her own strength in the living world as she inspected the endeavor to take much longer. Either way, she was happy to see that Demencia’s dead body was already gone and was on its way downstairs.  
What did take Cherri a decent amount of time was figuring out how to operate the thankfully-waterproof portal as she spent most of the time swearing and holding herself back from smashing it in a rage because she could not get the blasted thing to work. Who knew a fusion of necromancy and modern technology would be so hard to operate?  
Eventually Cherri managed to get the commands down and activated the infernal device. The same swirling red vortex appeared and out walked Demencia, looking remarkably similar to her old self considering she was now a demon. The only differences she had was completely black sclera, vertical-slit pupils for her still yellow eyes and the typical fanged mouth that was on every face in Hell. 

“YOUR HOME IS AWESOME!” cheered the now demonic-lizard-girl hybrid. “Do all the vending machines down there have cocaine?!”

“Most of them, and when there’s none of that, you could always just mix that leftover bottle of liquor with whatever you swipe from the nearest douchebag’s medicine cabinet. That’s a fun afternoon…” 

With her plan clearly a success, Cherri brought her new partner-in-crime along as they scanned the mountain looking for a military base to trash. They were not disappointed as they soon found a mountaintop facility with cable cars connecting to several smaller outposts. The two took off, also looking to see how much faster they were in the land of the living. Despite the base still being miles away and snow still raining down, the duo made it there in minutes.

The diabolical duo then walked up to the nearest guard station, currently occupied by a higher-ranked soldier carrying an assault rifle with a Gatling gun in front of him for extra intimidation. The guard pointed his weapon at both of them as they approached.

“No trespassing! This property of Panau government!” he shouted in his best English, causing the two to merely look at each other before turning to him.

“Panau, huh? That’s what this island’s called?” asked Cherri in her most cordial tone.

“Leave now or be shot!”

“Rude,” grunted Demencia. The guard pointed the two-handed weapon at her, but she merely smirked and put her mouth around the barrel of the gun and sucked it like it was a lollipop.

Before the very confused, and slightly turned-on, guard could pull the trigger he found a small red explosive roll right next to him before getting blown to smithereens. 

“Nice distraction! I’m pretty sure you gave him a boner before he died!” complimented Cherri as Demencia took the weapon for herself.

“I love tasting military hardware and now Flug can’t bitch at me that I might ‘Get tetanus’ or some other crap.”

With the alarm properly raised and troops headed towards them, the two charged in with Demencia’s new gun literally blazing. Before Cherri could do anything, she had shot four of the incoming guards dead. Not one to be outdone, Cherri picked up the Gatling gun from its stand and began firing at everyone that moved. It took several minutes, but soon another fifteen Panau soldiers laid in front of them on top of the ones her friend shot earlier. Demencia was speechless.

“Holy shit! Does this monster have a bottomless clip?!” cried Cherri in joy, oblivious to the mass of corpses in front of her.

“BEST! ISLAND! EVER!” cheered the lizard girl as she ran ahead and started grabbing guns left and right off of the freshly-murdered soldiers. She came out with three pistols, two more SMGs, five revolvers, four machine guns and almost a dozen frag grenades which she magically managed to store in her private stash.

“Okay, where do you keep all that shit?” asked Cherri as she propped the Gatling gun on her shoulder. Demencia merely shrugged with her tongue hanging out in blissful ignorance. The cyclopes decided it was not worth knowing.

“Eh, who cares? Let’s go! Onwards and upwards!”

Demencia took her words in stride as she pushed her new speed to the limit, easily running faster than any normal human and vaulting over buildings with one jump each. Five more unfortunate soldiers got a nasty surprise when Demencia literally crashed down on a group taking a smoke break. The potential lung cancer they were causing became the least of their problems as the girl, still unsure of her own demonic strength, literally ripped them apart with her bare hands.

“Holy shit…” gasped Cherri when she caught up with her, happily gnawing on a severed arm like a dog with a chew toy. “You did this?”

Demencia nodded, placing the arm in her mouth and panting like a dog.

“Niiiice…” Cherri honestly felt a sense of respect seeing such blatant brutality. 

The two continued their way through the outpost with another eight soldiers getting shot, mauled or their skull crushed underfoot as they ran amok until they reached the main compound. The concrete and steel structure stood several stories high and seemed to dominate the mountain around them. Already they could tell this was a high-level installation with dozens of armed guards and heavy artillery.

They ran in, literally guns blazing in each hand, and stormed the place. The guards loaded them with bullets, but the holes closed almost as fast as they were made. Demencia was actually the more efficient of the two, shooting vital points with frightening accuracy and constantly grabbing more firearms off dead bodies to keep herself fully stocked. Cherri treated every soldier like a toy with her occasionally just beating them into submission or taunting them before putting them six feet under. Before long another sixteen Panauan soldiers joined their fallen brothers before the two made it fifty feet in. 

“Okay, this has been fun, but is there anything else do but kill grunts?” asked Cherri as she finished slamming a rookie soldier’s head into the pavement until his face was paste.

Demencia scanned the base and immediately noticed six large radar dishes on the side of the structure, each colored red and emblazoned with a white star. The lizard girl got an idea as she pulled out three frag grenades out of hammer space. She then clung to the wall and scurried up much faster than she ever could before and flung the explosives into the dishes once she reached the top. Seconds later, three explosions went off one after another reducing the military hardware into scrap as they cascaded to the ground in a beautiful shower of shrapnel.

“Yay, wanton destruction!” Demencia cheered as she did not even bother climbing down and jumped over forty feet to the ground. Of course, her legs were shattered on impact, but thanks to now being a demon they mended in no time.

“That’s it, when we get back to Hell, we are ripping that snake bastard a new one,” commended Cherri as she followed her example by pulling out her signature bombs and sending them towards a nearby series of fuel tanks where three unfortunate soldiers were planning an ambush on the invading women. One of them tried to radio a warning to his comrade before the bombs went off, causing the tanks and them to go up in a massive fireball.

“That’s it, we’re best friends now!” affirmed Demencia as she pulled out a revolver and shot two more grunts who were trying to ambush them from above.

“Oh, we can be more than friends if you want…,” purred Cherri as she ran off to find more things to blow up. 

She and her new bestie got their wish as it turned out the base was filled with more targets to destroy and more unfortunate mooks who tried to ready themselves against the two-woman army that was tearing up the base. The wide array of destructible objects proved an exceptional test of their immortality and creativity.

The disastrous duo took down a broadcast tower, standing at twenty feet tall and colored red and white, by punching and biting down one of the beams until it fell over crushing another soldier trying to sneak up behind them. They then decided to get extra-sadistic by grabbing two more incoming soldiers, easily overwhelming them with their demonic strength and speed, and flung them as living cannonballs into a small generator right next to the fallen tower. The hapless goons died on impact as the collided into it headfirst with the generator going up in a flash of sparks and smoke thanks to the impact. They then proceeded to blow up a massive gas container, easily over five stories tall, with a barrage of machine gun fire and then used the shrapnel as melee weapons to slice and beat another six soldiers to bloody chunks. No matter how many times the enemy shot them or how many times they were caught in the explosions they made, they healed seconds later as they literally laughed off everything.

With all this going on, the remaining soldiers at the base began to panic. They had called for backup for the thirtieth time and prayed that their beloved president would send them reinforcements. Others still had the fanciful thought that they could somehow win. Granted there was still thirty-seven soldiers with a pair of mounted guns ready to make a last stand, but how dangerous could these two really be?

They got their answer when suddenly Cherri Bomb came in flying, having been thrown by Demencia, and crashed headfirst into the ground making her head burst into thousands of pieces. Before the few cocky soldiers could laugh at this though, her head began reassembling and looked at their terrified expressions.

“Hey assholes, who wants a bullet in their penis?!” she asked madly, causing one of the braver (or more suicidal, if you prefer) soldiers to step forward.

“Drop your weapons! You’re surrounded!”

“Oh yeah?” she mentioned before lowering her pistol towards the braggart’s private area and pulling the trigger.

“Well you don’t have a dick,” He dropped to the ground as she gleefully began firing in every direction while also occasionally punching or clawing right through their bodies as if they were screaming bags of warm jelly. She even shot the incoming Demencia by accident, but he lizard did not even feel it as the hole in her chest closed as she pulled out a stolen shotgun and began shooting the two massive fuel silos until each one went up in a massive explosion. The flying shrapnel killed the few soldiers still standing from Cherri’s massacre. One piece of metal even implanted itself in Cherri’s leg.

Instead of griping about it, the cyclops ripped it out of her and used it to stab the last soldier, this one an elite with actual body armor and an assault rifle, about fifteen times in the head so his brain now resembled off-color sashimi.

“Is that what you call skull-fucking?” asked Demencia, finally calming down from her high of destruction.

“Not really, but this is way more fun!” Cherri stood up and looked at the flaming wreckage the base was. What could have been a daunting outpost that would take a small army to depose was just a night of fun for the duo. As the sun began to rise over the horizon, the demonesses relished in the smell of smoke and spilt blood. They then looked at each other and felt a real bond. They both knew this was the beginning of a beautiful, chaotic and amazing friendship that could just maybe-

“HALT! YOU TWO ARE UNDER ARREST!” shouted a voice over the sound of helicopter rotors. Sure enough, the two looked up to see two choppers armed with mounted guns and rocket launchers bearing down on them.

“Good job killing the mood, fuckwad!” shouted an angry Cherri.

“Yeah, no one gets to interrupt loving scenes with heavy artillery but me!” howled Demencia as she pulled out her shotgun and began firing. The copters, though, were unfazed by her shells and began shredding Demencia with rapid-fire rounds. Even as her body was somewhere between whole and a chunky paste she was still clicking away at them, but she was not getting anywhere.

Cherri, however, had a plan as she summoned two of her explosives and sent them flying at the offending chopper. The other one, still getting into position to bombard the offenders with rockets, tried to radio his comrade to get away. Unfortunately, the pilot was too baffled as to how the freaky-lizard woman was still standing even after thousands of rounds. He did not even have time to shout in surprise before he was blasted to pieces. The helicopter fared even worse as it exploded in a chain reaction and quickly plummeted to the ground.

“YOU BASTARD!” screamed the enraged pilot of the still-flying chopper, now more than ready to obliterate them. He then fired a rocket and landed a direct hit on her, reducing her to a fine paste.

As Demencia already healed from her many, many, MANY bullet wounds, she felt her rage hit a boiling point. She was NOT going to let the schmucks have the last laugh. She ran over to the wrecked copter, ignoring the flames trying and failing to burn her, and ripped the bent, but still intact rotor off the top. 

“COME ON, YOU GUTLESS DICKWAFFLE! ROCKET ME RIGHT IN THE FACE!” screamed the hysteric Demencia as she brandished the gigantic piece of metal like a sword. The chopper pilot was happy to oblige and sent a rocket right at her. Instead of dodging, however, she swung the rotor down and sliced the projectile in half. Before the pilot could gawk at this, however, Demencia followed by lifting the rotor again and this time sending it flying towards the copter. The flying disc of death sliced the offending pilot like he was warm butter and quickly made the engine go boom, making the fearsome air-artillery fall to the ground as a fiery comet.

“YES! I HAVE AVENGED MY COMRADE!” 

“Umm, I’m standing right here.”

Demencia blinked awkwardly as Cherri was indeed standing right next to her perfectly fine, watching her whole display with her hands on her hips.

“Regeneration, remember?”

“Oh yeah! Whoops!”

“Even still, that was AWESOME!” Cherri actually ran up and hugged Demencia in a rare moment of tenderness that she would murder someone for if he ever brought it up in public. The redhead hugged her back, but she quickly backed away as she felt a burning sensation in her shoulder blades until eventually two bright green dragon wings unfurled from her back.

“Oooooh, me likey!” cooed Demencia as she already started flapping them, gaining altitude without even trying. 

Before Cherri could give a proper what the fuck, she felt a strong burning in her wrists. When the feeling subsided, she noticed her wrists had turned black. Without any warning, a jet-black grappling hook shot out and latched itself onto the wall, leaving a deep dent in the concrete. It receded with just a snap of her wrist. The one-eyed demoness could only think one thing as evil thoughts began going through her head. 

“This place just keeps getting better…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooooooooh...I've really done it now. Now I've made two practically indestructible nutcases with a multitude of deadly weapons AND they get superpowers with more destruction?! I almost feel sorry for this island...
> 
> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh, who am I kidding?! No I don't! More of the island getting ripped a new one next time!


	3. Meeting the Locals

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After that mass of destruction, it's time to settle down as Demencia and Cherri take some time off to meet the locals...while also causing some more mayhem.

With the base more or less trashed, Demencia and Cherri decided it was time to find somewhere else to cause chaos and make soldiers darken their pants in fear. The former took off with her new draconic wings, flying through the skies of Panau with no trouble save for occasional feud with a bird. Every time she got into a flying collision, the lizard-like demoness would spend several minutes chasing after it hoping to use its feathers to make a bed-nest for herself.

Cherri, while many would guess got the short end of the stick in terms of new powers, found her new grappling hooks to be extremely fun. She swung from place to place, letting her learn the reach of her cables was over 250 feet, and that they would magically stick to anything. Combine this with her near-instant healing of any injury and she was laughing like a lunatic as she lurched from point to point pulling herself along and occasionally letting herself crash into the ground just for kicks. Now she could brag to the boys back home that she had heard her own neck snap in eighteen different ways!

The snowy peaks eventually gave way to lush forests as the demonesses made their way down and away from the center of the island. With the two also realizing that they never got exhausted in the mortal world (a fact that was also giving Cherri _verrry_ naughty thoughts), the two reached a small town just as the colors of sunrise faded.

The town was maybe two-dozen houses all built out wood with bamboo supports to lift them up in case of any flooding. There were few creature comforts to be had as some buildings were little more than shacks, everyone drove a beat-up motorcycle or well-worn car and there were no signs of electricity. The people, naturally put off by the appearance of two black-eyed women who just wandered in after slaughtering a military base, were always apprehensive and walked with their heads down. It was soon made apparent why as they spotted a jeep filled with more red-vested Panauan soldiers, every person they passed looking away and trying not to lose their bowel control.

“Man, what’s gotten into these pussies?” asked Cherri as they eventually stopped on a random person’s shaded porch to watch foreign television. Said person was very confused about why two strange-looking women were on his property, but was keeping quiet on account of the revolver Demencia was happily twirling around her finger.

“My guess is a classic dictatorship,” responded Demencia with a frightening level of astuteness given her usual personality, “The leader of this island has funneled an absurd amount of tax money into his army, both to appear strong to foreign powers and to intimidate any potential uprising. They are probably doing regular rounds to prove their superiority and bully more money out of people.”

“Wow…You got all of that out of just looking around?”

“Hey, I’m not just dumb muscle! I had to learn all the essential aspects of evil to be a certified employee at Black Hat Industries such as various aspects and methods of tyranny.”

“Cool. What else did you learn there?”

“I learned the ideal way to steal lunch money!”

Cherri, and the homeowner they were holding hostage, blinked in confusion.

“What? Evil has to start somewhere!”

The other demoness had to give her a point there, but her train of thought was interrupted when the program was cut off by a sudden news announcement. A cheery jingle played as a picture of a white star over a red background, the apparent symbol of Panau, came on and cut to a stout, freaky looking man in a hideous green suit with a chameleon on his shoulder.

“Greetings, people of Panau,” droned the man in an insanely grating voice, “Your beloved President Panay has tragic news for you. A group of foreign agents ravaged one of our key installations in the Berawan Besar Mountains last night. 103 of our respected soldiers lost their lives to these terrorists and destroyed thousands in government-property. We suspect that this is the work of one of the many diabolical factions looking to overthrow our impervious government for their own malicious means. We encourage all citizens of Panau to report any possible suspects to your nearest station for a financial reward.”

The cheery jingle played once more before returning to the scheduled broadcast.

“Well, now we know the egocentric shit-wad in charge of this place. I’m honestly surprised there aren’t giant statues of the guy all over the place,” commented Cherri.

“Actually, there’s almost a hundred of them all over the island,” gulped the hostage homeowner, hoping that if he distracted the two with things to blow up they would leave his house. Unfortunately, he said that just as one of the patrolling guards walked by his property and overheard him.

“Hey you, was that conspiracy I heard?” threatened the guard while pointing a pistol at him. Cherri just rolled her eye as the man practically looked ready to pass out.

“Beat it, bitch-face, we’re trying to think of stuff to blow up.”

“You threaten Panau soldier!” yelled the guard as he pointed his weapon at her instead, “That capital offense! Apologize or die!”

“That’s seriously written into your laws? Man, at least in Hell you get to say whatever you want.”

“Die!” The guard unloaded multiple shots into her, but the barely blinked as each wound closed up in seconds.

“WHAT THE HELL?!” shouted the guard before Cherri sent a cable through his leg, sending blood everywhere and shattering his kneecap like a twig.

“Aaaaand…now I’m tired of your talking. Plus I always wanted to see what these babies could do to a person!”

And so Cherri proceeded to launch the other cable into his other leg, causing the guard even more agony. She then proceeded to yank her wrists back, ripping the legs off from the rest of him in a trail of blood and screams.

“AWESOME!” cheered Demencia as the guard’s anguish (And Cherri swinging his dismembered legs around like flails causing even more blood to stain the patio) soon called the rest of the group to his position. Soon three more red-vested goons approached the girls with more weapons locked and loaded. The homeowner did the smart thing and ran for the hills.

Demencia decided that it was her turn for some fun and revealed her wings, flying through two of the beams supporting the porch roof with a sawed-off shotgun in each hand. The three troopers opened fire on her, but even shooting her wings did no good since the holes would mend seconds later. The draconic girl fired shells into their heads one at a time until all three of them were dead with hemoglobin leaking from the remains of their craniums.

“And Flug said giving me a gun was a ‘recipe for disaster’, I’m a crack shot!” As she descended to the ground, she noted that Cherri had gone off and jacked the jeep the four soldiers drove.

“Get in, nutcase, we’ve got places to go.”

“What have you got cooking in there?”

“We’re gonna go meet with those three guerilla groups President Douchebag mentioned on TV. They might be fun to help out.”

“Meaning we get to blow even more bases up?!”

“Exactly. But first…” Cherri launched one of her cables at one of the remaining porch beams and yanked, causing the entire patio to come crashing down.

“I never said we only had to blow up military shit, right?”

\---

And so the demonic duo drove around Panau on a lengthy road tour…Or at least that was the plan. Not ten minutes after they left their starting point, they came across a gas station where a group of Panau elite soldiers was shaking down the store for money to fund their “glorious military.”

Demencia felt it was only appropriate to walk up to the head of the group, shoot him in the face with a revolver and then use his dead body as a blunt instrument to beat the others to death. The storeowner looked at the crazed demoness with genuine appreciation.

“You save my store! How can I repay you?”

Demencia only had to look over to Cherri for the answer. She drove their jeep straight into two of the gas pumps and caused a massive explosion. The draconic girl then revealed her wings and flew herself into the last two pumps, bringing about another giant fireball and bringing down the roof over the pumps to give one last ka-boom as the two reformed. The owner looked at the two in horror.

“Well, that was fun!” Demencia cheered as the two got into the jeep left by the group of goons they just massacred and drove off once again. Another six minutes later, they crashed the jeep into a ditch for shits and giggles and eventually just traveled using their unique abilities.

As they went on their merry way, they eventually found a map of the island and learned that Panau was about four-hundred square miles with a large central island and smaller island chains surrounding them. There were also three factions fighting for control while also sticking it to the government. They actually got that info free or charge, but it took Cherri punching a hole through someone’s head and a brief gunfight to get the map. That is what happens when try to shill a basic paper map to a blood-hungry demon for the equivalent for twenty bucks. They both laughed at imagining that man’s obituary. 

They eventually found out that three factions battling for control consisted of a nationalist group made of descendants from the island’s indigenous people who want to reclaim their birth called the Ular Boys, a revolutionary cell called the Reapers who wanted to overthrow the government for “the good of the people” and the Roaches who are more or less Panau’s equivalent to the mob. Cherri and Demencia decided to pay them a visit first.

After getting the coordinates from a very cordial drug dealer who was beyond understanding that Cherri could only pay for his fine product with money she looted from a soldier’s dead body, they were shown the way to their headquarters. Much to their surprise for the local drug cartel, the Roaches were located in a large three-story manor with an eloquent garden and all the trappings expected of an enterprising millionaire.

After confirming that, indeed, they were the ones who trashed that mountain base, they were welcomed inside and led into a well-furnished yet dark office often seen in old-fashioned mobster movies. The head of the operation was Razak Razman, an aging dark-skinned dressed in an impeccable white suit with absolutely no hair on his head. Despite looking like the kind of man who spent his afternoons in country clubs, he had a definite danger to him on top of his sophistication.

“Ah, so these are the masterminds behind that attack?” he asked, already aware of the situation thanks to his informants, “You have done my operation well! That factory was home to many soldiers who continue to poison our waters with their interference.”

“Eh, it was just fun for us!” asked Demencia, showing off her newly acquired demonic smile. The man was not fazed in the slightest.

“Is that so? Hah ha, if that is the case, then we could use two brilliant doctors like yourself to help cure the plight that is that horrendous president and his cronies.”

“Keep up making excellent crystal like this and we’re in,” complimented Cherri as she crushed the meth by just closing her hand and snorted it, kicking her head back as the high took hold.

“Oh ho! Perhaps you would be interested in a different form of payment?”

“Fuck yeah! You give us the good stuff and we’ll trash any base you point us at! Wanna try some, Demencia?”

“Sure!”

\---

Back at Black Hat headquarters, Dr. Flug was in the middle of constructing the next evil device that would raise his master’s profit margin when he suddenly stopped. A deep, menacing chill ran down the back of his spine.

_“I don’t know where…or why…But something unspeakably horrible has happened. The world is now in greater danger than it has ever been before. I actually feel…sorry?”_

“FLUG! Back to work! You used your five-minute break for the day already!” shouted Black Hat over one of the many surveillance devices around the lair.

\---

After watching the hilarity that was Demencia’s first exposure to hardcore drugs, Cherri carried the girl out on her shoulders as she was coming off her high.

“I saw so many colors…” swooned the half-unconscious demon, “They were all so pretty…”

“Yeah…you get used to it,” chuckled Cherri, fondly remembering her first time tripping balls. She was only grateful that her friend did not have to go through all those troublesome side effects like losing her teeth, depression or her organs going ape-shit.

“So now what? We still gonna see those other two groups?”

“Why not? If it means more shit to blow up and chaos to be had, then fine by me!”

“But won’t they get angry that we’re going behind their back and working with another faction?”

“What are they going to do, kill us?”

As she said that, a pick-up truck ran the two over. Turns out that Cherri was too distracted and carried them right into the road. They both reformed a few seconds later, Demencia even becoming sober thanks to the shock.

“Good point!” she admitted before shooting the truck driver in the head with a pistol and taking the vehicle for their own use.

“To the communists!”

After a quick drive down the west coast of the island, or as quick as you could be after driving off of multiple bridges, killing about fifteen more military grunts for funsies, and stopping for a soda, the two arrived at the secret hideout for the Reapers. This one was much more what they were expecting with a small compound far off the main roads and surrounded by trees. Outside was a shooting range where many of their members were using several propaganda billboards showing the esteemed President Panay as target practice.

“I like this place already!” cheered Demencia as they stepped inside the bunker. An older woman wearing a dress and baggy pants in all neutral colors quickly met them at the entrance named Bolo Santosi, the leader of the revolutionaries. She eyed the two curiously, looking for any signs that they could be of use to her.

“Welcome, comrades,” she greeted them in an accent so bizarre that this author honestly cannot do it justice in typing, “I have heard whispers of two strange-looking females who toppled a mountain base belonging to that tyrannical president. Let me be the first to congratulate you on a job well done.”

“Thanks! We made it rain metal and body parts! It was a fun day!” Demencia said she as she began crawling on the walls and sniffing random people. Bolo somehow maintained her composure at this.

“Ah, eager to fight for the people! That thirst for action reminds me of myself in my youth.”

Cherri made a mental note to find out who supplied this woman’s drugs. If looking at a one-eyed pyromaniac and a half-dragon girl reminded her of herself, she must be on some _amazing_ dope.

“So, you want to take down that micro-cunt Panay for ‘The good of the majority’ right?”

“Correct. His fascist rule is ruining this once-great island nation! The people now live in fear of his retribution, but our spirit will not be quelled! We will dethrone that swine from his pedestal and share the bounty he has been hoarding with the good citizens of Panau! So, comrade, are you interested?”

“Lady, if it means getting to hear more of you, we’ve got a deal!”

“Excellent! Flattery will not always win me over, but I will accept your proposal.”

She walked off, no doubt planning some more propaganda to win over the population and/or getting her pharmaceutical fix. Cherri just grappled Demencia by the wrist as the girl started playing Russian roulette with a crowbar.

“Yahtzee!” she shouted as she thwacked herself with the metal bar hard enough to force it into the shape her head.

“Come on, numbnuts, we’ve got some island boys to meet with!” Cherri then grappled a sports car passing by on the road outside the Reapers’ hideout and rode it to their destination much to the displeasure of the rich douchebag driving it. Once they got off, Cherri was sure to give him a face-breaking punch for his troubles.

The Ular Boys’ hideout was an island temple, more than likely built centuries ago for religious purposes, that had been converted into a military outpost overnight. When the two set foot on the ancient base, they were immediately met with several guns pointing at them and at least one person asking how much they charge per hour.

“Hold your fire, serdadus, these are special guests!” cried their leader, Sri Irawan, a mustachioed young man wearing a green beret and a brown vest. He spoke with a Malay accent, but seemed to have a fair grasp of English for a man who supposedly wanted to shun foreigners.

“My apologies for my brothers, ladies, they are unused to foreign visitors,” he greeted with remarkable poise as he led the two inside to a small room.

“Whatever, guns don’t scare us,” brushed off Cherri, “We took down an entire base like it was nothing, right?”

“Indeed! We were greatly impressed by your work in the mountains and were wondering if you would be willing to assist our cause to claim the birthright of the Ular people!”

“Can we blow shit up?” asked Demencia as she poked a random guard in the head. When he fired at her leg, he quickly realized that was a bad idea as the bullet hole closed seconds later.

“Of course! That despicable president Panay has defiled our home with his industrial and military complexes! We would be honored to ask for the help of two demolition experts such as yourself.”

And with that, the duo had all three factions under their belts. The sun was beginning to set as Demencia lazily flew around in circles on her wings while Cherri laid back in a beach chair with several bottles of booze she hijacked from a nearby bar. As she drank her third bottle of tequila, she gazed her one eye at the beautiful sunset.

“So Cherri, what are going to do tomorrow?”

“Well, since now I can’t get hangovers here, we’re gonna start working for our bosses tomorrow.”

“You think they’ll ever found out that we’re playing them?”

“I’m fucking sure they will, but we’re freaking invincible so who cares if they do?”

“Right! You got any more drugs?”

Cherri had to giggle at her naivete. She pulled out a syringe from in between her breasts and chucked at the dragon-girl as she landed. “That’s heroin. Go nuts.” And nuts she did go with her first dose of opioids. Demencia proceeded to fly through several houses, literally ripped a soldier’s heart out and eat it (which needed more salt, in her humble opinion), and then broke into a hotel room rented out by a government official. She promptly shot the bastard in the chest fifteen times with an assault rifle before finally crashing in the hotel bed as her high wore off. Cherri just laughed, fondly remembering her first time tripping balls, and climbed into bed next to her new best friend. While today was relatively tame, the one-eyed demon could tell tomorrow would be something special.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I know, a bit boring compared to last time, but next time we have another huge mission for the duo that will lead to many, MANY more explosions!


	4. Casino Bust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now we find our "protagonists" (Used in the loosest term) on the second main mission of the game: Trashing a hotel!

The destructive duo awoke late in the morning and, after the housekeeper wisely decided to keep quiet about the bloody murder committed in the room, enjoyed the mimosa that their government friend had ordered the night before. The two guzzled down the orange juice and champagne before heading out, conveniently not having to pay a dime for their stay. 

As they headed out of the hotel, they spotted a woman driving a sleek purple sports car. 

“Oh look, there’s our ride,” commented Cherri as she grappled onto the car’s back window. She quickly made her way to the front and threw the driver out onto the pavement. Demencia quickly hopped into the gorgeous automobile, even more excited at what kind of crash they could pull off. 

Cherri Bomb, surprisingly enough, proved a very skilled driver as she weaved in and out of traffic at ludicrously high speeds without even scratching the paint on the luxury automobile. 

“Aww, no car crashes?” whined Demencia, clearly eager for some carnage.

“Not yet,” admonished Cherri, “I’ve got something special planned for us! It turns out that there’s a humungous casino/hotel on this island and all three factions want the government goons out of the place!”

“How come?”

“The Roaches said the government was cutting in on their gambling operation, the Reapers want to reclaim what was once a local landmark and the Ulars just hate it because it brings foreign tourists to the island.”

“So…trash the place?”

“Yes, Demencia. We’re going to trash the place and you can go as nuts as you want.”

From there, the two excited lasses drove to the casino happily shooting several cars and passersby using their ever-growing stockpile of guns. With some carefully placed shots, the two managed to cause fourteen automobile accidents and offing thirty people with either vehicular damage or gunfire. They eventually got the car crash Demencia wanted when Cherri grappled a truck with one hand and latched the bumper of the car with another. The two were instantly pulled together and rammed into a hill together, causing a massive explosion. Once they regenerated from bloody chunks, the duo continued on their way by stealing motorbikes from two more Panauan militiamen. 

It did not take them long to spot their destination: The Panau Falls Casino. A massive pair of skyscrapers reminiscent of a gaudier version of the Petronas Towers from Kuala Lumpur, only shaped into lotus flowers and the bridge connecting the towers having “Casino” in giant golden letters on it. The duo rode their motorbikes up to a small convoy of red-vested soldiers checking on the incoming and outgoing tourists for any “contraband” which naturally changed whenever the guards felt like it. 

“Holy shit, that guy was right! President puny-penis built statues of himself everywhere!”

Cherri was referring to the twenty-five foot tall stone statue of honorable president, standing over the entranceway to the hotel.

“Grenade?” offered Demencia.

“You read my mind…”

The girls knew it was time to get the party started. Cherri pulled the grenade’s pin and sent it flying right at the base of the statue. Apparently the statue, despite looking like solid stone, was cheaply constructed as the one explosion at its base was enough to have it toppling over. The massive stone rolled directly over two of the guards, squashing them instantly.

“You son of a bitch!” screamed one of the guards, leveling a shotgun at Demencia. The draconic demon did not blink as she pulled out a machine gun and started firing not at the soldiers, but the cars around them. Cherri soon followed her example and pulled out an assault rifle for herself.

“What you doing?!” screamed one of the goons, baffled at how the girls were still alive despite taking seven shotgun shells to the heart each.

“What? This is a hotel, shouldn’t you guys have entertainment?” taunted Cherri as she fired the last bullet. One of the cars went up in a fiery explosion and soon a chain reaction was started. In only seconds, the entire parking lot was devastated. 

“Damn, I love this place! The cars are so fucking fragile that a few random gunshots make them explode!”

Demencia looted more weapons off their most recent kills, including a demolition officer carrying a large batch of C4 explosives. Cherri looked at the triggered explosives and got a horrible idea in her mind.

“Hey Demencia? How about we split up for this one?”

“Huh? You don’t want to work together?” The demonic lizard-girl looked genuinely heartbroken at that.

“Wha-?! No! Trust me, we’ve got plenty more asses to kick, but I was thinking it would be more fun to really test out our powers by ourselves this one time. Don’t you wanna see how many fuckers you can kill on your own?”

“Hmmmmm…” Demencia mulled it over as she picked up a burning car tire and inhaled the fumes to clear her head. After taking a long, deep breath of the burning rubber, she made her decision.

“Okay, but I want more crack for this when this is done!”

“I’m a really good influence on you…” Cherri sighed. The one-eyed demoness laid out the basic plan. The two of them would each one would take a tower of the massive hotel and axe off any soldier they came across. They would reunite once they got to the sky-bridge connecting the two and have a special surprise waiting for the soldiers there.

With one final handshake, the duo split up with Demencia going left and Cherri going right. Both of them barged through the glass doors and set about blowing away any red-vested goons they could find. 

On Demencia side, she crawled around the walls and ceiling while the soldiers tried to land a shot on her. While they assumed every shot missed, in actuality they hit almost every time. The boys were having a bit of trouble comprehending that any wounds or injuries she had would heal so fast she would not even feel it. Once she was done toying with them, she bludgeoned the ten of them to death with her bare hands. Every punch hit like a truck with her enhanced strength and with enough effort she was able to literally rip them apart. With the bloodbath started on her hand, Demencia got into the elevator and quietly rode her way up to the next floor.

Cherri, meanwhile, had an old-fashioned gunfight on her end. Despite being outnumbered twelve to one and getting shot in the head four times, the girl was laughing her head off as she fired off every type of gun she had at her disposal. Pistols, revolvers, sawed-off shotguns, SMGs and at one point pulled out the full-sized shotgun. She ran like mad, shooting with disturbing accuracy, and nailing each of the bastards in the balls at least once before finishing them off with a headshot or stomping on their necks if she felt especially vicious. The latter was how most of them died. Once the fight was over, Cherri went to the elevator and pried the doors open. She then used her grappling hooks to rappel up the walls of the shaft, slingshotting her way to each floor. 

The two entered an unintentional synchronicity as they went up floor by floor, utterly ravaging any soldier who crossed their paths. While they took liberal use of the firearms dropped by their kills, they also got very creative with their executions.

Demencia used her wings multiple times to crash through the windows and re-enter the floor from another angle. Her foes futilely wasted bullets trying to shoot her down, but they had still yet to realize their shots were doing nothing to her. Apparently they were only brought on board because the qualifications for being in the Panauan militia were to know how to pull a trigger and steal candy from babies. The draconic demoness laughed again and again in glee with every successful shot and resounding slam the bodies made as they were thrown dozens, and later hundreds of feet as she got to the higher floors, from the hotel onto the concrete below. The pile was eventually so high that the reinforcements had to climb over them to get into the hotel.

Cherri, meanwhile, was discovering just how horrifyingly efficient her grappling hooks could be for murder. Not only did they fly out and withdraw in seconds, she could fire two at once and then have them connect so whatever she grappled was pulled together. This meant that many, many, soldiers found themselves attached to walls, ceilings, furniture, or even other bodies by her tethers before being shot or beaten to death. She also found herself changing things up and ascending the massive hotel from the outside, rappelling herself to a higher floor and then busting her way in so she could bust more heads. All the while, Cherri was grinning in delight, reveling in the carnage and chaos as she felt completely unstoppable, soldiers trying desperately to find her weakness when there was not any. It was the ultimate power trip for her and she knew it would only get better.  
Eventually the duo found themselves on the top balconies of each of the towers. They locked eyes just as more soldiers rushed out of the doors with guns pointed at their backs. A pair of helicopters also decided to join in. 

“Hey Demencia, still think the choppers are gonna be a problem?” asked Cherri, completely confident even as two bullets were fired into her back.

“Fuck no! Watch this!” 

Demencia revealed her wings and took to the skies, barely phased as both helicopters fired off their machine guns at her. After looping around them, she pulled out a grenade launcher she had snagged from one of the more elite soldiers and fired off the explosive rounds. The copter went up in a massive midair explosion under the onslaught.

“Niiiiiiice…But watch this!”

Never one to be outdone, Cherri grappled onto the remaining whirlybird and latched onto the bottom. She quickly swung herself onto the front and then shot the guard of the copter in the head with a sawed-off shotgun. With only the pilot remaining, Cherri yanked him right out of his seat and commandeered the artillery for herself. She turned the guns onto the helpless soldiers, pureeing them under the rapid-fire weaponry.

Once she was done with the chopper, she simply rappelled onto the top of the sky bridge and let the aircraft fall to its destruction. Demencia quickly joined her.

“We! Are! Badasses! So are we going to play poker now?”

“Hmmm…Maybe later,” Cherri suggested, “But for right now, how about we plan one last surprise for the last batch of twats coming after us?”

“You think there are still soldiers left?”

The duo quickly looked down and saw roughly a dozen military vehicles pull up to the hotel’s doors.

“So what’s the plan? Shoot them? Fling giant exploding cows at them? Dubstep them to death?!”

“All very tempting, but no. I found something very special off of some demolition experts the Panauan pussies brought with them.”

Cherri reached into her cleavage and pulled out several C4 explosives from before. Demencia could already smell the plan the cyclops was cooking up and rushed to prepare. 

After several minutes of waiting, the suckers arrived as roughly forty officers piled into the sky bridge. The demonic duo just stood in the middle, playing rock-paper-scissors with each other. The loser of each round had to shoot themselves in the head with a handgun. Demencia was actually winning 28-21 by the time they showed up.

“You totally surrounded! Drop your weapons and come with us!” commanded one of the leading soldiers.

“Buzz off, douchebag, we’re busy,” grumbled Cherri as they started another round. This time she won with paper forcing Demencia to fire a revolver round into her skull. Like always, she was right as rain seconds later.

“If you no come, we shoot!” 

“Okay, seriously, how fucking stupid are all of you?! We’ve gotten shot thousands of times, and yet we don’t have a scratch! You meatbags, on the other hand, are getting smoked faster than my last batch of crystal meth! When are you all just going to stop acting like whiny little bitches and give up already?!”

Judging how all of the Panauan forces were leveling their guns at them, the answer was fairly clear.

“Explosion time!” shouted Demencia as she pulled out the detonator and activated it, causing all the C4 charges to explode and reducing the bridge, and everyone on it, to pieces.   
Demencia and Cherri regenerated on the ground, laughing their asses off among the massive pile of broken glass, bent steel, and remains of their foes rained down around them.

“Holy shit, did you see the look on their faces when you pulled the trigger?! At least two guys shat themselves!” Cherri was almost crying at the thought.

“Hahahaha! Boom boom! We need more C4! Let’s raid a surplus store for more!” Demencia was just ready for more demolition work.

Their laughing fit was interrupted, however, when the two felt a burning surge go through their arms. It was over in a second, but this time they knew exactly what it meant.

“NEW POWERS!” they both cheered as the stood up. Demencia focused on her arms and suddenly conjured flames between her fingers. 

“Oooooohhh!” awed Demencia she willed the fire to grow into a ball. She lobbed at one of the many cars left behind by the mass of soldiers and it was ablaze instantly. Thanks to the marvel of shoddy Panauan engineering, it exploded a few seconds later.

Cherri did the same, but found bolts of electricity going between her fingers. With a bit of concentration she created an arc of lightning between her hands and sent it flying towards another car. The spark instantly reached the gas tank and made the vehicle combust.

“We are fucking monsters! Come on, let’s go trash a bar and get plastered!” The cyclops cheered as she entered one of the remaining cars. Demencia ran onto the roof and launched a stream of fire from her fists as they drove off, making every other car explode. It was a glorious fireworks display to cap off the demonesses’ latest victory over the overcompensating President Panay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And as if these two weren't overpowered enough, let's give them fire and lightning to further turn the island into their bitch! This is so much fun! Tune in for next time where the ladies break in their new powers with some break-ins for their employers!


	5. Strongholds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a long while, fellow lovers of destruction, but worry not! An extra-long chapter to satisfy your appetite! Onwards to more blood!

After their latest victory, the diabolical duo went on a joyride causing as much havoc as possible. They originally left the Panau Falls Casino in a military jeep, but that was quickly lost when Cherri leapt out of the driver seat and it drove off a cliff. The two spent miles either flying or grappling their way down the open road, eager to test their new abilities.

Of course their little rampage quickly attracted the attention of the Panauan military, but they were quickly dealt with. Demencia happily set many of them on fire, her twisted grin being the last thing they see as they were burned alive. Cherri, meanwhile, was having endless fun tethering any dumbass who crossed her to the ground or a vehicle before zapping the life out of them.

Their swath of destruction lasted for hours between their new elemental powers, mowing down their opponents with guns, committing vehicular manslaughter, or just beating them to a literal pulp. Once they finally settled down, they returned to the hotel they brutalized and literally flew up to the penthouse suite to spend the night.

Thanks to the endless energy granted to them by their demonic nature, the two had no need for sleep unless they felt like it. They instead spent the majority of the night downing drinks, doing whatever drugs Cherri had on her, or simply breaking whatever they felt like. The hotel managers, while averse to having their property damaged by guests, was not suicidal enough to tell off the women responsible for leaving a pile of corpses at the front door and blowing up a massive portion of the building.

The two were currently burning the midnight oil with Cherri guzzling down her fourth bottle of tequila while Demencia watched TV waiting for another news report from President Panay covering their latest rampage.

“Aaah!” breathed Cherri as she finished the bottle and smashed it against the wall, “I gotta admit this place has some premium booze, not like that bathtub gin back home that tastes like literal piss.”

“How do you know what piss tastes like?” asked Demencia.

“Let’s just say there are some _reaaaaaally_ kinky bastards where I’m from. Even kinkier than me, I mean.”

Before she could elaborate, the tell-tale jingle of the Panau government channel came on and showed the tacky-suited dictator himself. “People of Panau, there is urgent news to share. The duo of foreign terrorists responsible for the destruction of the mountain base have resurfaced and launched an attack on Panau Falls Casino. They murdered approximately 212 loyal Panauan soldiers in their bloodthirsty conquest to weaken our magnificent military. There is also information that these two are now aligned with multiple guerilla factions looking to usurp the government. Any and all information on the whereabouts of these terrorists will be met with substantial financial compensation.”

Once the message was over, Demencia lifted up the TV and flung it out of the penthouse windows.

“Why’d you do that?” asked Cherri.

“Because DESTRUCTION!” shouted Demencia as she then let herself fall out of the window. After several minutes and a sickening thud, the girl flew back in the way she came without a scratch on her.

“Goddamn it, you are hilarious!”

“What can I say, crazy is as crazy does! I’m gonna do that again!”

The rest of the night passed in relative peace, if you can call one girl repeatedly throwing herself about seventy stories out of a building for fun while her friend drank thousands of dollars in liquor peaceful. When the sun came up, the two strolled out of the hotel leaving the room looking like a warzone.

They simply spent the morning taking in the sights of Panau while, of course, causing more chaos with the likes of carjacking, gunfights with soldiers and the occasional shooting of civilians for fun. All the while, they did admire the pristine jungles and crystal-clear waters that made up the southeast-Asian paradise. For a brief moment, they even felt bad that such a lush landscape was being converted into a dictator’s empire with military bases and oil manufacturing taking over the forests and beaches. It actually made them feel bad for the population of Panau.

Not enough to tone down their destructive antics, mind you. Especially when the abundance of oil pipelines and gas tanks gave the two an impressive amount of targets. Cherri delighted in learning that her electricity was capable of hacking the pipelines and causing a massive chain of explosions that blew away anyone too close to the pipe. Even with their appreciation for the place, Demencia and Cherri were itching as always to destroy anything they could get their hands on.

They soon got their wish when they were contacted by none other than the Roaches claiming that their boss had a job for them. A few minutes later the two found their way to a phone booth painted blue and with the cartel’s emblem on the side. Once Cherri dialed the number given to them, they were soon met by Razak himself driving up to them in a blue van.

“Excellent work at the casino, ladies! As exceptional as that was, however, we need your magic hands once again to expand our trade.”

“We gonna bust a rival drug dealer?” asked Cherri as Demencia barely overheard them while looting passersby for drug money and fruit snacks.

“Not to worry, we are THE medicinal provider of Panau! That privilege, however, comes with some drawbacks like that cancerous President Panay closing our trade routes through the premiere harbor in Panau City. We need you to infiltrate the harbor and reclaim it so we can once again practice free trade.”

“Sweet!” cheered Demencia as she stole some candy from a nearby baby.

“Yeah…Sign us up for that. It won’t be long before she gets bored and starts eating people if we stick around here.”

“I didn’t think you’d be that sentimental,” commented the don.

“Oh, normally I let her gobble up whatever or whoever she wants, but the sooner we get this job done the sooner we get more drugs and I wanna get more of your stuff. That shit’s addictive by crack’s standards!”

Razak, either because of the promise of more profit or simply to escape the fact that one of his employees just admitted she has no problem with cannibalism, laughed and brought the two to a nearby helicopter where they would begin their mission. A short ride later the two found themselves in the premier port of Panau along the northwestern shore of the island. Nestled in the capital city, the only major metropolis on the island, the port was loaded with cranes and smokestacks all bearing the white star logo of Panay’s regime. The duo of demonesses departed from the chopper with Razak bidding them farewell.

“Alright, let’s get in there and shoot some assholes!” cheered Demencia as she summoned twin fireballs in her hands.

“Eloquent as always,” remarked Cherri, “Now let’s fuck shit up!”

The cyclops kicked off their raid with throwing half a dozen frag grenades at the unsuspecting guards at the front gate. The eight of them were blown to pieces before any of them could even say “Ow!”

With the gate cleared out, Cherri grappled onto the roof of one of the towers near the entrance while Demencia simply leapt into the base with a revolver in one hand and a ball of flame in the other. It did not take her long to start frying and/or shooting any hapless grunt who got in her way.

Cherri, meanwhile, decided to play sniper from the towers with a machine gun as she picked off enemies as they charged in from afar. When one of them discovered her position, she grappled to a new vantage point on the roofs while shooting lightning at her aggressors and happily yelling about what she would do to their mothers in bed.

Once they had cleared out the outside, the two began moving through the various warehouses that made up the port to find more goons to gut. The ladies got extra creative with these executions from Cherri electrifying a metal catwalk to kill all the soldiers trying to shoot them from above to Demencia welding the doors shut with her flames and turning the place into a shooting gallery.

It was not long before the two reached the central point of the compound where a final stand was set up by the soldiers. Several mounds of sandbags and another Gatling gun with a bottomless clip was all that their opponents could do to set up a final confrontation.

“Okay, that’s all the pussies could come up with?” wondered Cherri, “What, no force fields or biological weapons?”

“Maybe in the next game!”

“What?”

Demencia gave her signature shrug, tongue sticking out and everything, as she blindly charged in with a pair of pistols. The soldiers let loose a rapid stream of bullets from their heavy artillery, but that did little to slow her down. Even as the shells ripped through her body, her demonic form regenerated near-instantaneously and she still fired off her rounds into many unsuspecting faces.

Cherri, meanwhile, grappled around to the back of them and then let loose her lightning. Within seconds all of the remaining militiamen were fried to a crisp.

“YAY! Fresh meat!” hailed Demencia as she proceeded to gobble one of the well-done goons. As Cherri stared at her voracious companion, the lizard demon actually held out a chunk of arm meat for her to try.

“You want me to eat a dead man’s flesh?”

“Mm-hm!”

“Eh, fuck it. Can’t be worse than drugs.”

Cherri was actually surprised by the taste of man and how it was superior to many of the culinary offerings in Hell. As she pulled out a bottle of tequila from her hammerspace boobs, they were quickly met by Razak who flew to the center of the base via personal helicopter.

“A job well done, ladies! With your expertise, this harbor shall be a beacon for free trade once again! Now, how would you prefer your payment?”

“Medicine, the best you’ve got,” replied Cherri as she ended up taking a few more bites. Once again, Razak was unfazed by the blatant cannibalism in front of him and had his subordinates bring out a suitcase filled with “pharmaceuticals” to satisfy his new best agents.

“Pleasure doing business with you, ladies. Keep the free trade flowing!” Demencia and Cherri ran off with their contraband and decided to tour the city. Unlike the ramshackle huts and sprawling coasts, Panau City was a concrete jungle with massive bridges connecting the four major districts and buildings scraping the heavens. This gave the duo countless ideas on new forms of mayhem they could cause to the government and civilians alike. Whether it was grappling cars to objects for vehicular manslaughter the likes of which God has never seen before or fly-by fire bombings, the duo literally painted the skyscrapers red as they saw the sights and demolished several more Panay statues which were littered all throughout the city.

Once night fell, the two ended up making their way out of town on a hijacked bus before the literally crashed just as they got off the bridge. Their regeneration was now so advanced that the two were not even fazed by the impact and continued to snooze until sunrise. Once they were awoken by a suicidal convoy of soldiers who wanted to arrest the two for the grand theft auto, the girls shook the sleep out of their eyes by Demencia blasting their heads off while Cherri had multiple of them tethered to the wreck and electrocuted en masse.

“Seriously, when are these little shits going to learn they can’t stop us!” boasted Cherri as she looted even more firearms from her fallen foes. “I hope never! Then it wouldn’t be nearly as fun!” Demencia spoke as she shot herself with a vial of heroin to further boost her adrenaline. The girl flew off, now literally and metaphorically high, ready for more carnage while Cherri drove under her in the goon’s jeep.

Their potential mayhem was interrupted, however, when a jeep belonging to the Reapers intercepted them saying that Bolo had a job for them as well. The ladies quickly agreed and soon met with the head communist lady herself who relayed the mission in her hilarious accent.

“Your power is most certainly impressive, ladies. That level of strength can rally the fire in people so they have the courage to rebel against Panay’s oppression. Despite your feats, though, they still live in fear. We need to make a statement to reignite their passion while also strengthening our cause.”

“Let me guess, you want us to take over some huge base so that putz doesn’t have it AND you get whatever goodies he has there?” asked Cherri.

“Exactly, comrade! The president has a base in the mountains, not far from where you first arrived, where his scientists test jet and rocket propulsion in high altitudes. If you could seize the base, we could utilize that research and return the spirit of the islanders!”

“Count us in! More explosions mean more fun!” yelled Demencia as she pulled out an assault rifle and began open firing on a nearby freeway to make the cars explode.

“She gets bored easily,” commented Cherri. “Then I trust this will whet your appetite,” assured Bolo.

“Sweeeet…” purred the cyclops as she pulled out a machine gun of her own started shooting up the vehicles herself. Their little shooting contest ended in a draw with nine exploded automobiles a piece. Sure, dozens of civilians were dead, but all the two of them cared about was settling their score at this mountain base.

Bolo, either through supremely warped logic or some grade of pharmaceuticals even Cherri might find excessive, took their rampant disregard for human life in stride and invited them aboard a nearby helicopter which would take them to their mission. The duo was whisked away from the outskirts of the city back to the snowy mountains and were dropped off less than a mile outside the facility.

“Good luck, my revolutionaries! Show them the fury of the oppressed!” bid Bolo as the chopper readied to take off again.

“How much you wanna bet she’s an even worse leader than the current president?” asked Cherri once they were alone.

“Pretty likely. This sort of political agenda is typically done to gain the allegiance of a beleaguered populace only for its emphasis on community-driven resources and equal rights to quickly vanish in order to ensure their newfound government’s power is permanent,” answered Demencia with disturbing clarity.

“How…do you do that?”

“Huh?”

“Go from bat-shit insane to actually smart like that?”

Instead of answering, the lizard-girl simply pulled out a random charred arm from her hair and nibbled on it while apparently trying to think of an answer with her eyes crossed and stroking her chin as if in deep contemplation.

“Oh who cares, let’s just kill more fascists!” The demoness charged in with a shotgun and surprised the five patrolling guards by blowing their heads off. Once the way was clear, she zapped the control panel on the front gate causing it to short-circuit and let them stroll in.

Demencia, meanwhile, flew overhead and spotted numerous fuel tanks with soldiers nearby trying to regroup. One lobbed fireball later, all that was left was flying shrapnel and the overcooked remains of Panauan troops.

“AHAHAHAHAHA!!! Fireworks for everyone! Death to all who oppose us! I want room service!” she yelled as she quenched her thirst for blood, sometimes literally by drinking it, as she shot fireballs, gun rounds of every shape and size and occasionally herself to bowl soldiers over and rip their throats out as she passed them.

Cherri Bomb, seeing such magnificent mayhem, felt her insides stirring as she thought of a song she once heard in a film long ago.

_“You turn me on, pah-rump! You turn me on, pah-rump! You’re not too tall, you’re not too short, you’re not too round, pah-”_

She lost track when a pair of soldiers snuck up behind her and tried firing at her with SMGs.

“DO YOU MIND?!”

In retaliation, she sent a grappling hook into one man’s genitals before sending the other end of the hook to his friend’s privates. The two screamed even louder as the cable was pulled together and messily castrated the two.

“So inconsiderate…” she muttered as she pulled out a revolver and silenced the pair with headshots. Once she was calmed down, as calm as a murder-happy demoness could get, she noticed another helicopter flying towards her.

“Oh no, another chopper…” she drawled with sarcasm so thick even the pilot could hear it, “What ever shall I do? It’s not as if I have dispatched a dozen of them already…”

Demencia beat her to the punch, however, by commandeering a nearby flak cannon and blowing the copter out of the sky.

“Come on, Cherri! More destruction awaits!” she rallied while pulling out a grenade launcher and barreling further into the base.

_“Yep, **definitely** turned on now…”_ 

The cyclops followed her equally insane friend down a ramp where soldiers set up another garrison. The duo did not even bother using cover as they walked through the hail of bullets, their organs and muscles healing off the damage by the second, and proceeded to beat the goons to pulp with their hands for a change.

“Oooooooh!” awed Demencia as they walked past their latest bloodbath into a large pit only to find three gigantic gas containers. All of them were spherical, over twenty feet tall and marked with the red and white Panauan logo meaning they were primed to explode.

“Seriously?!” exclaimed Cherri, “They are just asking for people to blow this island to rubble!”

Demencia decided to break out something special for the occasion - the C4 charges. She could already imagine the grand finale they would make once the mission was done. Once the explosives were set, the two moved up and out of the storage area back onto the path towards the main terminal of the base. The two decided to take two nearby trucks the rest of the way and proceeded to run over and soldier dumb enough to get in their way. Another dozen schmucks were run over as they drove forward until they found the last bastion the government set up. Just like the port base, it was a ring of sandbags guarded the last twenty militiamen along with a Gatling gun pointed straight ahead.

“Hey Cherri, I’ve got an idea…” spoke Demencia.

“Shoot.”

She answered by pulling a revolver and firing a round into Cherri’s eye.

“Very funny,” she deadpanned once her face was back to normal, “Now what’s your idea?”

The erstwhile soldiers, meanwhile, were still oblivious to the demons meeting only a hundred feet away from them and manned their posts. They were soon called to action, however, when two of their own trucks came charging straight for them. The leader of the group stepped up to the machine gun and sent hundreds of bullets into the trucks until they exploded from the onslaught.

“Ha ha!” boasted the gunner, “That’ll show them!”

Those turned out to be his last words, however, as a sniper round was fired straight into his skull and ended him instantly.

“IT’S A TRAP!” shouted one of the slower soldiers.

“No shit, dipstick,” snarked Cherri as she sent lightning coursing through three of them while Demencia continued to pick off the rest from a nearby roof with her rifle. Thanks to all the rounds she stole from Panauan gunners, she had plenty of reloads ready and thus had room to shoot many of them in the testicles or get really fancy and shoot the weapons out of their hands while her partner struck the rest with her lightning. Once they had finished off the rest, Demencia flew over to her partner who was tucking more weapons into her cleavage for later.

“How many guns you got in there?”

“You wanna find out?” teased the cyclops as she squeezed her breasts, much to Demencia’s confusion. Before they could get much further, a helicopter marked with the Reaper’s logo flew in.

“Excellent work, comrades!” congratulated Bolo, “Now all the information here can go to helping the people and reclaiming their rights!”

“Yeah yeah, viva la revolution, what’s our pay?” asked Cherri.

“Oh trust me, ladies, you will be handsomely rewarded for your efforts. I hear you two are quite the connoisseurs of alcohol.”

“Maaaaaybeeee…” mentioned Demencia as she giddily pulled out a detonator from her hair. “We have quite the collection of spirits both from foreign beneficiaries and those taken from government swine.”

“Now you’re speaking our language!” complimented Cherri as she pulled Demencia aside and grappled them to the edge of the pit where the massive gas spheres were.

“Now?” asked Demencia like a kid wanting to open her Christmas presents.

“Now.”

One button push later and a massive KABOOM rattled the mountainside as the chambers became a trio of enormous fireballs that sent smoke and debris miles high. The two would have been killed by the shockwave were it not for their organs’ ability to go from paste to perfect health in five seconds.

With that done, the two leapt off the side of the mountain and landed on a freeway far below them and started running off to cause even more trouble. Despite being on foot, the duo was blazing trails as they blew through any roadblock the government had set up. On multiple occasion, they commandeered one of the mounted guns and turned it on the soldiers. Cherri eventually jumped in the driver seat of the vehicle while Demencia tried in vain to empty the infinite ammo of the weapon on everything in sight. Trees, cars, mountainsides, innocent bystanders, all of them were targets to her. Cherri eventually ran the car of the road and into a boulder for kicks to close out the day. One ransacking a house later and the two hit the hay after splitting a bottle of stolen gin.

The next morning, they were greeted by a letter from Sri claiming that he too had a mission for them to benefit the Ular Boys. Once they got ready for another day of fun, they made their way to the lantern that the nationalist picked for the rendezvous point.

“Rise and shine, saudaras! I hope you are enjoying what Panau has to offer.”

“Yeah, it’s a real fun place!” agreed Demencia as she started ogling one of the machetes carried by Sri’s goons.

“Excellent! Now that you see all the natural beauty of this island, I’m sure you’d agree that the industrialization that our ‘president’ is developing is a travesty.”

“Yeah, even I’ve got to admit, it’d be a real shame seeing this place covered with airfields and docks,” said Cherri, “So let me guess, you’ve got a compound for us to enter and beat the shit out of every soldier there?”

“Absolutely right, saudara! The place we need you to go, however, is quite special. It is the only nuclear power plant on the island.”

“AWESOME!” shouted Demencia, already imagining the kind of havoc they could wreak at such a place.

“While I am not keen on such a facility, it is a major provider of power to the islanders and thus have no intention to fully destroy it.”

“Ugh, don’t tell me we have some namby-pamby guidelines to follow,” groaned Cherri, “My girl and I here work best when we get to cut loose.”

“Relax, saudara, I will in no way restrict your methods. I want this facility captured not to dismantle it, but merely to free it from government influence and expand the power of the Ulars. Will you be of assistance?”

“What’s in it for us?”

“The Ulars are very skilled in the herbs and medicine of this island. I happen to have some recipes to make natural remedies that I believe you’d be very interested in.”

“Whoa there, pretty boy. I’ll have you know I am a fucking _expert_ at anything snorted, smoked or shot. This better be primo stuff you’re offering.”

“There is a good reason such remedies are not used anymore, saudara. They have been outlawed for this island for centuries and, were they ever to be released on the market today, would make even the purest cocaine look like cough medicine in comparison.”

That got the ladies’ attention. If they really had a recipe to make shrooms into something like that, this mission would be more than worth it.

“We’re in! Bring on the drugs!” cheered Demencia as she pulled out two pistols and started firing them into the air cartoon-style. A few bullets killed some passersby on the way down, but Sri was only concerned with the mission.

“Fantastic, saudaras! A helicopter will take you to the plant shortly. Once there, feel free to be as creative as possible with your raid and prepare yourselves for the experience that is ancient Ular medicine.”

The demonic duo quickly made their way to the provided chopper and found themselves flying towards the eastern part of Panau where the terrain was almost entirely jungle. The nativists soon dropped them off outside the plant, the multiple conical silos sticking out like a sore thumb as no other buildings on the island resembled them.

This time, the two did not waste any time chit-chatting and got straight to business with infiltrating the place. Once again they saw a line of guards manning the front gate with some placed on watchtowers to spot any incoming threats. What they did not expect, however, was Cherri Bomb using a grappling hook to pull the guys off the towers and let them plummet to their deaths while Demencia roasted the ones on the ground.

With the gate cleared, Demencia flew them in with Cherri hanging onto her legs. Once they were in the center of the plant, the cyclops let herself freefall where she literally hit the ground running and proceeded to shoot any soldier she caught sight of dead with a machine gun. Even as she peppered with rounds from all sides, the girl just kept shooting until her gun was out of ammo. That was not the only problem for the army, however, as Demencia stayed above them taking potshots with a revolver and dropping grenades onto unsuspecting groups. By the end of their latest rampage, another forty grunts had their blood splattered on the walls.

The demonic duo regrouped on top of one of the silos. “Nice job with those bombings,” complimented Cherri as she loaded a revolver she stole off one of their latest kills.

“Aw, thanks! I’ve got a great partner-in-crime!”

“…And a partner in something else, if you feel like it…”

That last statement confused the dragon-like girl as Cherri gave her a rather… peculiar expression. If Demencia did not know any better, which contrary to her insanity she did, and thought her friend looked _aroused_. Before she could ponder on that too long, she spotted a surface-to-air missile launcher some ways away and got another terrible idea.

“Hey Cherri, you can use your lighting to make machines go haywire, right?”

“Sure! What have you got rattling around in that pretty head of yours?”

She pointed to the mounted SAM and the cyclops got the message loud and clear. As another wave of hapless minions tried to snipe them off their perch, Cherri grappled over to the SAM and sent an electric pulse that quickly made it start firing off rockets in random directions. Several buildings were leveled as well as nearly every other soldier in the place was turned to a fine red paste by the massive blasts.

“Welp, hope Mr. Closed-Borders didn’t need most of this,” commented Cherri as she and Demencia strolled through the now mostly-trashed base. While there were a few stragglers, they were quickly dealt with in various painful ways. Strangled to death by grappling hook, tethered to walls and then beaten to death or, in one sap’s case, being straight-up eaten alive by a ravenous Demencia. Once her latest meal was done, the woman started thinking about how her partner seemed to be flirting with her. While she was flattered by the thought and had a legion of fanboys on social media, she felt conflicted as her heart and body still belonged to the maniacal mastermind Black Hat. She was brought out of her thoughts when she saw yet another final stand set up exactly like the last two.

“Okay, now this is getting old,” snarked Cherri, “Are these twats that lazy or just fucking stupid?! They really thought this would work now when it hasn’t worked twice already?!”

“Guess that means more targets for me!” She brought out the rocket launcher and barely gave the blokes a moment to react before she bombarded them with high-explosives. “Damn…they didn’t even see you coming…” Cherri spoke, her voice noticeably quieter than usual.

“One of the first things you learn at Black Hat Academy: Fair play is for those who want to lose.” Now it was Cherri who was lost in thought as Demencia snatched up any remaining weaponry from the newest batch of dead fighters. While Cherri was a slut and a kinky bitch through and through, it was rare she ever genuinely got close to someone. Other than her protégé Angel Dust, she had maybe a dozen people she legitimately trusted or, Hell forbid, actually looked up to. Yet here was the insane girl who she had spent days with having the best time ever and growing to respect her brand of insanity without ever realizing it. That latest stunt made Cherri realize something as she once again felt her nether regions heat up.

_“Am I…in love?”_

Her own fantasies were cut short, though, as Sri and the Ular Boys arrived on the scene to claim the now-liberated power plant for themselves.

“Ah, marvelous job, saudaras! I must admit, you completed your job faster than I could have ever hoped. Now then, we have the recipes for our ancient medicines ready for you, but be sure that only you two use them. The last thing we need is for them to go on the black market.”

“Sure thing, el capitan!” assured Demencia as she walked over with an armful of weapons and stuffed them all in the seemingly bottomless bag of holding that was her hair. With her hands free, she took the recipe sheet and was now ready to go ingredient hunting.

“Hey Cherri, you okay?” she asked her friend who still looked spaced out.

“Uh…fuck yeah! Let’s go get high on mushrooms and then sack another bar!”

“Whatever you say, buddy!”

With that the two took one of the military trucks that survived the rocket storm and drove their way to a place where they could spend the night and then find the components to this secret super-drug. While Cherri drove with her usual expertise, she could not shake off that she her feelings for Demencia had changed without even realizing it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is already a crack fic by every meaning of the word so why not a crack pairing to go along with it? Tune in next time for the next main mission!


	6. The White Tiger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now, after a lengthy hiatus, we return with your next dose of insanity that can only come from a nerd who combined three random source materials into one story!

Demencia and Cherri Bomb, possibly for the first time since they arrived on Panau, felt truly at peace. They had just taken their first dose of the Ular Boys’ secret drug and quickly found that they were not exaggerating how potent the stuff was. With just one puff out of a bong each, both of them were dazed for hours and could feel their bodies tingling like crazy as it ran through them. If any normal person took this, they might have fallen into a coma at best or died instantly at worst.

For them, though, it was the greatest high ever conceived and with their demonic regeneration in effect it would never lose its potency. The two spent the rest of the day vegging in the jungle just lazily eating some wild fruit and occasionally shooting the breeze (sometimes literally) as the day rolled on. Once they could finally think straight again, night had long since come and so the two followed up on their promise to raid a bar.

Naturally, the first one they found was currently occupied by government soldiers claiming to be providing protection when they were actually abusing their power to get free drinks. When one unfortunate bartender tried gently asking them to leave, a sloshed gunslinger pulled out his pistol and all but demanded the woman hit the sack with him.

“Okay, that’s it!” yelled Cherri as she pulled out an assault rifle and stormed in. The offensive guard found his life cut short by twenty rounds being rapidly fired into his chest.

“What the hell-?!”

“Listen up, you fucking assholes! I am a slut, through and through, and I have done some really messed up shit, but that was unforgiveable! Rape is just fucking wrong no matter how you cut it, end of story, and you’ve got one chance to back off now before I send all of you to my turf in Hell!”

“Fuck you, bitch!” slurred one of goons as he actually tried to stare her down only for Demencia to set him on fire. For once, her insane grin and cheery demeanor were gone.

“Cherri?”

“Yes?”

“I’m going to kill them,” she blankly stated, “Are you going to help?”

The cyclops lowered her weapon and decided to let her have this one. Demencia, in return, finally got serious as she proceeded to literally tear the militia several new assholes simultaneously. One second she punched a man so hard his head nearly spun 180 degrees, the next she shot a man in the eye while setting his compatriot’s face ablaze with one finger. In less than a minute, all fifteen or so of the offending party were charred, mutilated, and bloodied beyond recognition. The demoness refused to touch the meat on any of their corpses and looked half-ready to keep filling them with bullets as she walked up to the stunned bartender she inadvertently saved. She pulled out a pistol and handed it to the stunned civilian woman.

“Go home. If anyone threatens you, point this at them. If they still don’t leave you alone, pull the trigger. Got it?”

The woman vaguely nodded and ran for her life as Demencia took a barstool and started chugging the beer that was left on the bar-top.

“Sit down. Have a drink,” she offered her partner-in-crime. Cherri did just that and took up an untouched martini that was left nearby from a fleeing patron.

“That was pretty brutal, even for you.”

“Yeah…I just can’t stand rapists.”

“That makes two of us. There’s a special set of slums in Hell for people like that and when the annual purge comes around, that’s always the first place where demons get axed. Heck, I’d even beat the shit out of one just for funsies or to steal his drugs. It was probably the closest thing I’ve ever done to a good deed.”

“I can respect that…”

The two drank in silence, letting the alcohol calm their senses and slowly sink into a pleasant buzz. As they burned the midnight oil, they actually started talking about their pasts. Demencia went on and on about teaching the art of villainy to up and coming ne’er-do-wells and all the missions she ran in order to please her beloved Black Hat. Cherri mostly stuck to her time in Hell, growing her turf and the escapades she had with the likes of Angel Dust. She even mentioned some dame named Charlie looking to redeem demons so they could go to Heaven instead of being killed off.

“Wow…That’s pretty cheesy for a demon to do,” commented Demencia.

“Weirdest thing of all? She’s supposed to be Satan’s daughter, the literal spawn of Hell. But she’s probably the nicest one down there while the rest of us try to fuck with each other on a daily basis.”

“Whoa…” rasped the lizard-demon in an intentionally bad Keanu Reeves impression.

Cherri could only chuckle. “Jeez, you are ridiculous. But at least, with all the crazy shit I’ve pulled, I can count on a friend like you.”

“Huh?”

“This may come as a shock, but whenever people work together in Hell it’s so they can either screw each other over later or try to get something they both want…and then screw the other person out of it. I haven’t had someone I can rely on in a long time. Call it schmaltzy, but I appreciate knowing you really want to help.”

The lizard girl was honestly floored. Sure, she caught a brief glimpse of Hell and figured it was not rainbows and orgies, but to hear that something basic like trust or camaraderie was scarce was disturbing. She supposed honor among thieves could only get someone so far, which made even more sense with her usual line of work. The only reason no one double crossed Black Hat was because they were too afraid of him and the schmucks who tried were made into wall decorations or merchandise.

After that, the two did several rounds of shots and eventually let the alcohol put them to sleep. When the morning sun rose over Panau’s east shoreline, Demencia was still snoozing while Cherri was finding a taxicab. Once she found one and kindly told the driver to fuck off unless he wanted to literally bite a bullet, she took the front seat and started honking the horn.

“Oy, dragon breath, wake up! We’ve got a big job to do!”

“Eh…mazel tov…” mumbled the drowsy psycho.

“Come on, Demencia, I’ve got nice, powdery cocaine to wake you up!”

“SNOWFLAME WANTS HIS POPSICLES!”

“Atta girl, now get in here!”

Demencia all but tore the cab’s passenger-side door off its hinges as she got in. Sure enough, Cherri pulled out a vial of powder and let her partner snort it up in order to get some spring back in her step.

“WOOOOAH, that’s good stuff! So, what terrible things will we be doing today?” Cherri soon turned the car on and began driving them west.

“I’ve heard word from all around the island about this revolutionary group called the White Tigers. A band of machete-wielding desperadoes looking led by some enigmatic leader claiming to be a god.”

“Ooh, another faction, what a twist!”

“Yeah, but from what I can tell, the head of this place who just goes by The White Tiger is a foreign visitor whose actually working for a bigger boss.”

“The other three don’t like him, right?”

“Exactly. The Roaches don’t want some cartel from overseas stealing their business, the Ulars naturally hate someone from off the island butting into their business (Or maybe just hate that someone else is doing the whole jungle-marauding routine,) and the Reapers…I’m pretty sure their just pissed because Bolo can’t get them to cooperate.”

“You mean she can’t bone her way into an alliance with him, right?”

Cherri almost drove off the road due to laughing too hard from that remark, but eventually calmed down enough to respond.

“Yeah…Probably. Either way, I’ve gotten word of some guy out in the desert who knows where to find the White Tiger. We’re gonna find him, make him tell us where he is and then kill him so his little band of groupies fails.”

“Okey dokey!”

With the mission briefing done, the two began having their own brand of fun as they drove southwest towards the desert. This included forcing cars off of bridges by grappling them over the side, setting trees on fire, raiding gas stations for cheap beer and pretzels and of course playing a real-life version of crash mode from _Burnout 3: Takedown_ by causing the most outrageous traffic accident imaginable. The winner had to be when Demencia used her fire to melt the tires off a bus causing to flip end over end, rolling over six other cars in the process all white Cherri broke out her signature namesake bombs and then caused the bridge they were on collapse behind them from the force of the explosions.

After about six hours of straight carnage with taxis, motorcycles and at one point a helicopter, the duo found the trees and lush coasts give way to massive sand plains and towering rock formations as they entered the desert. While not quite as varied as the lusher parts of the island, there was a certain serenity to it that the ladies could appreciate…breaking with their usual chaos.

The two eventually sprinted to their final destination as they found a shady looking, even by Panau’s underbelly standards, goon standing outside a nondescript straw house looking over his shoulder every few minutes.

“Hey there, buddy!” greeted Cherri in an overly chipper tone, “We’re new in town and looking for a man we’re supposed to meet today. Could you please tell us where we could find the White Tiger?”

“‘White Tiger?’ Sorry, I can’t quite seem to remember…” he feigned and started rubbing his fingers together in the universal sign of “Put bribe here.”

“Oh, _I_ get it. Sorry, but we don’t have any money on us. Maybe I can do…something else to get your help?”

“And what would that be?”

“Weeeeeell…” Cherri then put one of her hands on her hips and the other on the collar of her low-fitting shirt. She then sauntered over to him swinging her hips, not noticing that Demencia was actually watching her ass sway back and forth with great interest. As for the ne’er-do-well, his hesitation was completely gone. Instead he walked up to Cherri Bomb and seemed much more willing to talk.

“I suppose I _could_ tell you what you want…If you can give me a good reason.”

“Oh, I’ve got a good reason…”

She then immediately dropped the sexy act as she picked him up effortlessly and threw him back against the house hard enough to send him through the wall. As he dug himself out of the rubble, she stood over him with a terrifying grin as lightning sparked off of her hands.

“See, I bet you’ve heard rumors of two badasses ripping that twat Panay’s regime several new assholes these past few weeks. Well, I just so happen to be one of those badasses! To clarify things, I am a literal demon from Hell who is immune bullets, has about sixty stolen guns and three dozen explosives on her, can shoot grappling hooks out of my wrists that can rip right through your body _and_ I can shoot lightning out of my hands. And that’s _just me._ My partner over there is just as dangerous and even more bloodthirsty than I am. So either you can give us the information we want or you can be the…Hey Demencia, how many fuckers have we killed on this island?”

“878!”

“Thank you! So, Mr. Playboy, do you want to be asshole #879 who gets to go to my home-turf in Hell?”

“No no no! I’ll tell you everything! The White Tiger has an associate named Ken Pang, _he_ knows where the White Tiger is!”

“And just where is this Ken now?”

“He’s about to be executed for his gambling debts! It’s just across the river, it’s called Lengkok Sungai, and you can still make it since the execution is tonight!”

“Perfect! Demencia, kindly give this man something for his troubles.”

As Cherri stepped away, the other insane demoness stepped up to the now-completely freaked out informant and puckered her lips. The man wizened up and leaned in for a kiss, only to instead get a painful shock as Demencia took a huge bite out of his neck. As he quickly started to die from the mutilation, he could hear her chewing up his throat-meat and start licking the blood off her fingers.

“What? We never said we _weren’t_ going to kill you if you helped us.”

“See? Told you she was the crazier one…” commented Cherri as the lowly grunt died, his last moments made all the more embarrassing by being blue-balled for the second time in two minutes.

The pair of them then flew/grappled their way out of town and across the river to the gambler’s den they were told about. The place was a set of pagodas painted various shades of brown connected by roofed walkways with a massive open-air patio in the center. With their destination in sight, the girls realized the execution was not set to happen for several hours. This meant they could either stealthily wait for their target to arrive and craft a meticulous plan in the intervening time or they could rush in headfirst and tear the place apart until they found their culprit. The former would require intricate planning and surveillance of the area along with careful consideration of their resources. The latter would mean a bloodbath that could lead to dozens of innocents being killed and enormous property damage.

Take a wild guess which one they picked.

“CHARGE!” shouted the trigger-happy demonesses as they bolted through the front entrance. The door guards who were suicidal enough to get in their way were broiled alive and zapped for their troubles.

 As they stormed down the hallways happily filling anyone in their way with bullets, the duo proved to be a frighteningly competent team. Even with the knowledge that there was no way to really injure each other thanks to their overpowered regeneration, they worked in tandem like they had been pulling off raids for years together. Whenever one was in danger of being snuck up on, the other shot the attacker before he could do anything. They only needed to share a glance in order to know what the other was thinking. And on top of it all, they were both touched by how much the other watched out for them. It was rare for ladies in super-villainy and gang wars to find an ally they could trust absolutely.

After almost an hour of straight mayhem and another sixty bodies added to their count, the satanic buddies found their target in one of the many rooms being held at gunpoint by two guards.

“Don’t move an inch or we shoot!” they boasted in unison.

“Okay then,” agreed Cherri as she shot a grappling hook as the gun-toting goons and made them fly into each other hard enough to draw blood. With them tied together, Demencia unfurled her wings and flew the two outside and high into the air where she proceeded to drop them fifty feet to their painful deaths.

“Oh thank the heavens!” praised the gambler as he literally dropped to his knees, “How can I ever repay you?!”

Cherri pulled out a sawed-off shotgun and fired it behind him, making Ken nearly pee himself in terror. “You can tell us where to find the White Tiger. We want his head.”

“No! The White Tiger has saved me countless times…Every time I go into debt, he pulls me out of it! I owe him too much!”

“Really? Because I didn’t see any of his tribal buddies coming here to rescue you. And in case you can’t tell, we slaughtered a couple dozen people just to get here so what’s one more to us?”

“…Alright. I’ll take you to him.”

Cherri put away her weapon as she led him back outside past the aftermath of their attack. It was easier to find a surface that was not stained with entrails. They found Demencia back in the central plaza sorting through the cache of weapons she looted off the den’s guards.

“Okay, so I’ve got seven revolvers, ten pistols, six SMGs, eight sawed-off shotguns, six shotguns, ten machine guns, seven assault rifles, about thirty grenades, ten C4 charges, four sniper rifles and two grenade launchers! Plus I found someone’s stash of heroin in their pocket!”

“Aah, the perfect thing to unwind with after this little party. Pass me a syringe.”

The two shot up and let the drugs run their course as Ken, somehow fighting off the urge to ruin his pants, was awestruck by their carnage. Once they stuffed all their new goodies into their hair and cleavage, which was somehow the weirdest thing he has seen all day, he brought them out to a pair of motorbikes parked a few hundred feet outside the gambling lodge.

“So, you’re gonna be our escort for this?” asked Demencia.

“I don’t have a choice…” he muttered under his breath.

“Aw, poor little compulsive gambler! I maybe an alcoholic, a drug addict, and a mild nymphomaniac (Demencia wondered why she was staring at her when she said that), but at least I take responsibility for myself! You’re just some little pussy who needs someone else to bail you out because you can’t control yourself!”

“But please, think about what you’re doing! The White Tiger is fighting for the freedom of this island! He genuinely cares about all of us and wants Panay stopped so this madness can end! Can’t you look into your hearts and reconsider?!”

“Hmmmmm…” pondered Demencia as she started pacing around deep in consideration. Her eyes were tightly shut, her usual scatterbrained nature gone as if she truly meditated on his pleas. When she finally opened her eyes once again, she looked at the hopeful Ken and gave her answer.

“Nope!” She then proceeded to summon an extra-large fireball and flung it straight at Lengkok Sungai. The all-wood construction of the building combined with the dry desert air meant the fire spread almost instantly until the entire place was engulfed in minutes and soon crumbled to the ground. While Ken was absolutely horrified by the loss of his favorite gaming spot (Oh yeah, and the possible human lives lost, he supposed), Cherri was extremely conflicted.

_“Don’t do it, Cherri. As much as you have a raging she-boner right now and want to finger yourself raw from that, don’t do it! You’ve got a job to do, and once that’s done_ then _you can masturbate all night while guzzling chocolate liqueur._

“Cherri, are you ready?” asked Demencia.

“Huh?”

“I’ve got Ken on his bike and I’m ready to fly, but what’s up with you? That’s the second time you just froze up.”

After a brief period of hesitation, the cyclops finally answered “It can wait until after we find this tiger, alright? Now let’s go kill a rebel faction leader.”

“…Okey dokey!” With that, Demencia revealed her draconic wings and took to the sky as Cherri followed behind Ken on the other bike as they headed south. As they raced past the dunes in the desert heat, the group was met with roadblock of over a dozen red-vested gunmen blocking the way between a nearby rock formation and a house.

“All of you are under arrest!” barked the elite in charge. While Ken merely cowered behind Cherri, she looked beyond unimpressed.

“You’re joking, right? We’ve killed literally hundreds of your men, blown up military bases and even just burned down an illegal casino and we’re ‘under arrest’? Isn’t there ever a point where you just shoot first and ask questions later?”

While the captain was insulted and was about to give the order to open fire, he never got the chance as an airborne Demencia dropped half a dozen grenades on the blockade causing a massive chain of explosions between her weapons and the cars which combusted along with the charges. The lucky few who survived that bombings were quickly dealt with by Cherri shooting them in the face.

With that distraction dealt with, the unlikely trio kept moving forward until they reached the entrance to a massive fort made out of a broken cargo ship that was crawling with even more soldiers. As the two peeked inside, they were already hoping this was another chance to have fun.

“Okay, if you two are dead-set on finding the White Tiger, I have his coordinates on my PDA but it was confiscated by those guys at the gambling den and they sold it to the government for profit. If you want it back, you’ll have to-”

But the two were already gone as Cherri flung herself onto the top of the gate and was pumping schmucks full of bullets with a pair of SMGs. Demencia took the more direct approach and was running and gunning her way through the buildings along with occasionally setting those poor unfortunate souls on fire.

“That’s far enough!” boasted what the girls was the leader of the group. Aside from being seven feet tall, he also wore a red beret on his head and was wearing a specially-made red armored vest with a white star decal on the back.

“You must be the boss! Let’s fight!” cheered Demencia as she started firing wildly, but much to her surprise they had no effect.

“I am a colonel and I say you two are finished!” He then held up the PDA the girls were looking for.“Unless you want this to be destroyed, you’ll come quietly!”

The colonel pulled out an assault rifle as he stuck the PDA on his belt and entered the world’s longest one-on-one shootout with Demencia as neither of the two made a dent in each other. The former’s vest was somehow completely bulletproof while the latter was barely fazed by the shots as she healed from them in seconds.

Cherri, meanwhile, just watched from the sidelines in amusement as the unstoppable force seemed to finally meet the immovable object until she realized something.

“Hey, Colonel Cocksucker!” she shouted, “Is that bulletproof armor made of metal?”

Both of them were caught off-guard by this interruption and looked at her in confusion as she walked up to the goliath of a man.

“Yes? Why do you ask?”

“Because that means your armor conducts electricity!”

She placed a hand on his chest and sent a massive pulse of electricity through him. The man did not even have time to scream as the lightning coursed through him and his heart was stopped by the shock. She then plucked the conveniently unharmed PDA off his belt and returned to the gaping Ken Pang.

“Y-Y-Y-You did it…”

“Well, no shit we did!” taunted Cherri, “What part of invincible badass she-demon don’t you understand? Now open this thing so we can get moving.”

Ken reluctantly took the PDA and entered the necessary passwords so the girls could use it.

“Well, I think is all we’ll need. You can go, Ken.”

“What? B-But...why?”

Demencia then stepped forward. “As the old villainous saying goes: you have outlived your usefulness.”

The criminal-turned-demoness then ended his life with a point-blank revolver shot. While the man did help them make it this far, they both knew he was still a sniveling gambler who sold out his apparent savior with little conviction. Plus, now the government would stop harassing him for money now that he was in the afterlife.

“Do you teach a course on that at that school for evil? Cheesy villain lines 101?”

“No, that’s only an elective for students unless they want to major in villainous assisting which is a commendable line of work that is dying out thanks to the excessive amount of material people can find online. It’s a crying shame…”

After that genius insight, the two took a helicopter from the now-empty fort and took to the air for the final leg of their journey. As they closed in on their destination, they crossed back into the lush greenery of the main island and ditched their ride (Read: jumping out of it and letting it spiral into a crash) and trekked through the trees on foot until the PDA indicated they were right on top of their supposed target yet no one was around.

“Well, shit,” remarked Cherri, “Looks like this is a dead-end.”

“But why would that colonel guard a PDA that was a hoax?” questioned Demencia, showing rather frightening rationale for a mental case.

“Let’s face it, there are gamers that know more about tactical strategy and warfare than these morons. Best guess is they didn’t even bother to check the info before they took hold of it-”

She was interrupted when she felt a prick on her neck. When she reached around for it, she found an old-fashioned blow-dart and felt a heavy sedative course through her. A few seconds later, Demencia got stuck the same way. The lizard girl quickly collapsed on the ground from the toxic dart, much to Cherri’s confusion.

“What are you doing? You’re immune to poisons.”

“But it feels sooooo good! My legs feel like noodles!”

Cherri just sighed at her, proud of how her quasi-girlfriend had acquired a taste for illegal substances and began firing an assault rifle in the general direction. She quickly found her mark as she heard panicked voices run through the trees assuming they did not have a bullet lodged in their brains. After hearing several bodies hit the ground, Cherri moved in and found several stereotypical guerilla soldiers either dead or wounded beyond repair. The ones that were still alive got fatally zapped for their troubles.

She came across one of the goons fully unscathed, cowering behind a rock and praying in a foreign tongue for someone to save him.

“Hey, Rambo, up and at ’em. You’re gonna take me to your boss.”

“W-Wha?! What you want with the White Tiger?!”

“We’ll tell you once we see him. Now let’s go before you join your friends here.”

“B-B-But…You got hit with dart! That poison can knock out jaguar!”

“Yeah, funny thing is I’ve taken so many drugs that nothing knocks me out anymore,” she half-lied, not willing to explain the whole truth again, “My partner’s letting it affect her. Speaking of which, get up, you fucking loon!”

“Fiiiiine,” whined the other assailant, “But I want some good pills once we’re done with this.”

“Deal. Now, is our esteemed guest gonna make it easy for us to find his boss or are we going to have to force it out of him?”

“Oh, let him resist! I haven’t gotten to shoot someone’s nuts off all day!”

“AAAGH! Alright, I take you!”

With their latest unwilling accomplice to guide them, the two were brought to a stone temple far away from any other landmarks. The main building was surrounded by dozens of twenty-foot high stone columns all sitting on a rough stone floor. When they got to the center of the temple they found the last thing they ever expected to find, even for the two of them; a middle-aged Caucasian man wearing a loud blue Hawaiian shirt and white khaki shorts. If anything, he looked less like the leader of guerilla revolutionaries and more like an aging wanderer who ended up here after one too many margaritas.

“Well now, lookie what we got here!” he exclaimed jovially with a thick Southern accent, “You must be the bambinas that have been tearing up this island harder than a load o’ eighteen wheelers tearin’ down the highway.”

The two demonesses just stared at each other, both at a total loss for words for the first time since they stepped foot on Panau, and looked back at the almost-senior citizen.

“You…are the White Tiger?” asked Demencia.

“Well, that’s what the good ol’ boys out here in the boonies call me, but y’all can just call me Tom Sheldon. Pleased to meet ya!”

“You’re not the least bit worried about us finding you?” ventured Cherri, secretly hoping he had more of the Ular-brand mega-mushroom mix on him.

“Well, you ladies have been causing quite the ruckus since you’ve been here, so I figure we can be allies since we all want Baby Panay out o’ his highchair. Cop a squat, I’ve got barbecued pig almost ready to eat!”

No amount of illegal contraband would make the girls think this whole situation was normal, but they decided to relent. As they sat and watched the old soul cook his pig on a spit to perfection, they noticed the grunt who brought them here was long gone.

“Alright, you rabble-rousers, soup’s on!”

The two took their share of the barbecue pig, and had to admit it was absolutely delicious. While it was not flesh taken from the corpse fo their enemies, the smoky pork was still a treat for their taste buds. There was one problem with the man’s hospitality, though: it made it much harder to make him bite the bullet.

“Soooo…What’s a pasty ass like yourself doing out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean?” asked Cherri after they were finished their meal.

“Well, I work for a special little branch of the government called the Agency, a top-secret division.”

“So secretive they couldn’t think of a better name?” joked Demencia.

Tom let out a hearty laugh at that. “I reckon so! Hahaha, but in all seriousness I’m supposed to be lookin’ out for foreign threats and resolve them before they become Uncle Sam’s problem.”

“And they send…you? How much stuff are they huffing in the White House these days?”

“Well, in all honesty, I’ve gotta buddy named Rico who was supposed to be here a while ago. _He’s_ the real demolition expert, while I help out with intel and instructions. Problem is, some other dictator took over his home island o’ Medici and so he amscrayed the Agency to help his birthplace instead. Wish they told me that little nugget o’ wisdom _before_ they sent me out here…”

“Rico from Medici, huh? What’s he like?” wondered Cherri as she crossed her legs.

“Six foot tall and carries grenades the way grandmas carry handbags. He’s a one-man dictator-destroyin’ machine who can take a bullet better than most o’ the guys back in Vietnam. Trust me, if he were here, Panay would be peein’ his pants in hours.”

Cherri then had to block any and all thoughts related to a Demencia-Rico three-way before she ended up literally drooling and having to excuse herself to go pleasure herself before she exploded. Thankfully, Demencia found something else to talk about.

“So you were supposed to stay out here and act as recon for this Rico?”

“More o’ less, but the thing was they were gonna say I went rogue and then I’d contact him undercover as another alias…Ah, but yer not interested in that ol’ hooey. I bet you two wanna get back to blowing Panay’s little regime sky high!”

Cherri, feeling a twinge of guilt for the first time in her afterlife, scratched the back of her head. “Yeah…about that, we’re working with the three cartels on this island and we were supposed to find you for them so…”

“Wait a minute! You mean to tell me you’re in with the mob, the commies AND the jungle boys?!”

“Pretty much!” answered Demencia as she started eyeing the metal rotisserie spit.

“If you sisters are already in deep with those nutjobs, then maybe you three can move ahead with the plan I had set up for Rico!”

“And what would that be?” asked Cherri.

“The Agency is wonderin’ why Panau suddenly turned into a dictatorship after years o’ being buddies with us. The word in Washington is that Baby murdered his democratically-elected daddy to take the helm, and has put all this money into buildin’ up the military in order to prove itself a world power.”

“And the reason for this is…?”

“Oil, of course! Panau sits right on top of a massive oil field worth billions!”

“You know, that _does_ explain the massive amount of gas tanks, pipelines and fuel shafts around here…”

“But what’s up with the random barrels of explosives all over the place?” wondered Demencia, even her insane logic failing incapable of putting all this together.

“Beats me, but anyhoo, all three o’ those gangs y’all hooked up with have a foreign superpower backin’ them. At least, that’s as much o’ the rub they told me about,” resumed Tom.

“And so you want us to get in tight with the gangs until they reveal their hands and then we take out the big boys so that America gets all the black gold?”

“Exactamente, sweetie! So what do you say…You two interested in helpin’ the good ol’ US of A?”

“Give us a second…” Cherri said as she pulled Demencia outside to the courtyard to talk.

“So what do we do?” asked the lizard girl, “Do we just off him like we planned or do we take him up on his offer?”

“Well, I frankly don’t give two shits about who gets a ton of oil. But…I bet if he’s got ties to the American government we can get some _major_ loot out of him.”

“Like more drugs?!”

“I know the DEA has a massive stash of stuff they swipe from dealers and cartels once their caught, plus he may have some more hardware for us to play with.”

“SOLD!”

“Assuming he’s not some senile twat who’s actually conning us. If he is, then we fill him with bullets and send him to Zimbabwe in a box.”

The duo returned to the American with a few last questions on their minds.

“So, you mujeres made up yer minds?”

“What’s in it for us if we help you?” asked Cherri.

“Well, I heard you got a taste for the finer things in life like cocaine and big guns. I just so happen to be a black-market dealer who can hook you ladies up with any weapon or vehicle you can think of. Plus, I think I can pull a few strings to get ya more ‘medicine’ if it will be an asset to you.”

The demonesses nodded to each other and Cherri reached out her hand. “You’ve got yourself two new partners-in-crime, gramps.”

“Terrific! Hand me that PDA you got from Ken so I can stay in contact with ya.”

“You’re not the least bit sad we offed like fifteen of your guys?” asked Demencia as she pulled the device out of her hair.

“The whole White Tiger thing was just a ruse until Rico finally showed up, but with you gals here I think it’s safe to call that whole operation off.”

“Uh…you do know we’re here to kill you, right?” asked Demencia.

“Okay, what the fuck?! Now’s not the time to act crazy!” admonished Cherri.

“Trust me, I kinda figured that all on my own. Between hearing about Ken biting the dust, good riddance to that schmuck, and you girls havin’ more bloodlust than a pack o’ lions at a steak buffet it was pretty obvious.”

“So…what do we do now then? Our other employers all want the White Tiger dead.”

“One sec…”

Tom then headed into the jungle and found the sniveling guerilla that originally brought the ladies to him.

“Here’s the White Tiger, ladies. Fire away.”

“Kay,” replied the demons as they both emptied dozens of rounds from an SMG into the poor schmuck.

“And with that, the White Tiger is no more. I mean, who’s gonna think some old American fart’s behind all this?”

“Good point,” admitted Demencia.

Before the two could get much further, though, an overwhelming tingling filled their bodies once again. With that last kill, the two had once again reached the point where they had caused enough chaos and bloodshed to unlock yet another round of new abilities. For Demencia, her entire body began changing as her skin was replaced with vibrant green scales and her fingernails became razor-sharp claws. To complete her transformation, a large tail emerged from above her behind.

“Huh. Guess it was a matter of time before I went full-demon!” thought Demencia as she looked at her new form.

Cherri, meanwhile, looked absolutely the same.

“Uh, ain’t somethin’ supposed to happen now, darling?” asked Tom, having overheard about their whole process of gaining new powers through one of his contacts.

“Yeah, but I shouldn’t sweat the small stuff. Her upgrades tend to be a lot more visible than mine for some reason.”

Just as the three were deliberating, several police sirens sounded off in the distance. The sound of tumbling trees and vehicles storming over dirt filled the air in every direction as the girls realized that someone else may have been listening to their conversation about the White Tiger.

“There’s the enemies of the president! Capture the White Tiger and kill the others!” barked one of the commanders over a bullhorn. As the first wave of troops leveled their guns at the one-eyed demoness, the now fully-draconic demoness and the portly American intelligence agent, they all thought the same thing.

“This is nothin’ but target practice for you, ain’t it?” asked Tom.

“Yep!” replied his new cohorts as they charged in. Demencia quickly started using her new body to her advantage as she slithered in on all fours like she had done so before, then used her new tail to knock soldiers down with enough force to shatter their knees as they passed. Once they were ripe for the picking, the girl would use her claws to rip open their chests and snack on their innards along with her usual use of gunplay and pyrokinesis all while soaking up bullets thanks to her near-instant regeneration.

Cherri, meanwhile was still using only her lightning and her own stash of guns and explosives. While this was most definitely not an inherent problem, she could not help but feel shafted which for a foul-tempered demoness with regular drug usage meant she was quickly getting pissed off. As she felt the growing urge to stab something, she felt something tingle down in her bones and a stark white object jutted out from her thigh. When she touched it, it immediately shaped into the hilt of a sword. Pulling it out revealed the foot-long blade made of sharpened steel that somehow harmlessly emerged from her body.

“Oh fuck the hell, _yes…_ ” said Cherri, delighted by this prospect. The nearest soldier got grappled over to her, then had his head sliced off to prove that the sword was not just for decoration. With this revelation, Cherri entered a destruction frenzy to match her rival as she slashed and stabbed every goon in sight. She also explored the depths of her new ability as she quickly found she could make just about any melee weapon she could think of. Blunt instruments like hammers, crowbars and Bo staffs, projectiles like throwing knives and shuriken, and bladed weapons of every shape and size. Whether it was an average switchblade or a massive two-handed sword that would make an RPG protagonist jealous, it was at her disposal in endless quantities.

It took a solid fifteen minutes for the girls to hack and slash their way through the miniature armada. Every square inch of the temple’s paved floor was coated with blood and the remains of the soldiers who tried to take the mythical White Tiger and his two new cohorts into custody. Weapons were still strewn about as Tom observed the scene before him. While most people would be traumatized beyond belief by such a massacre, the old agent was mighty impressed. Had this been any other circumstance, he would have been halfway to a Panauan government prison for war criminals. Now he knew for certain he made the right choice in siding with the two demonesses as even his entire legion of guerillas would have been slaughtered by the army’s superior numbers and firepower.

Said demonesses, meanwhile, were actually taking a moment to rest after their latest work of chaos. Demencia and Cherri, in all their years of mayhem-making and violence, had never imagined they were capable of such an incredible feat. The two met eyes, Cherri really observing her partner’s new draconic appearance. At the same time, Demencia noticed the bloodied axe still held in her partner’s hand…and quickly pieced together why there was an abundance of slashes, decapitations and signs of blunt weapons being used to cave in skulls and rupture internal organs.

Their silence was only broken when Demencia walked over the mass of corpses between them and placed a hand on Cherri’s shoulder.

“…What?” asked the cyclops, but got no answer. The hand on her never left as the half-dragon girl still stared at her.

“Come on, you’ve been a bucket of crazy this whole time, don’t clam up on me now!”

Still no answer, though. She finally had enough of the silence and started hacking away at the nearest dead body while shouting at Demencia.

“Answer me, damn it! I’m a lot of fucking things, but I’m not one who takes suspense well! What do you want from me?!”

With each swing, she splattered more and more blood on her and even a few specks on her partner. The other demoness answered by walking right up to her and placing a kiss on her lips.

“Fuck me, that was hot!”

Cherri’s confused expression quickly turned to a lecherous grin as she returned the favor. They then spent the next several hours doing enough dirty deeds that it would be impossible for the author to describe without this becoming smut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is a crack fic, so why not have a crack pairing as well? For the record, though, Demencia DOES still love Black Hat. If literal mind control couldn't do it, chances are having a girlfriend still won't change that either. Next time, though, we'll explore this new relationship along the way to more carnage and explosions!


	7. Girlfriends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now, after an unintentionally long delay, comes our demonic duo tearing up even more asphalt but now with the occasional bout of sex! And yet somehow I feel that's one of the tamest things I've done so far...

One of the benefits of being a demonic being in the mortal realm, as the intrepid and insane duo of Demencia and Cherri Bomb knew now more than ever, was having unlimited stamina. They needed no rest and only stopped their chaotic mayhem when they genuinely wanted a moment. This never-ending energy also meant that any time they ate or drank was purely for pleasure rather than a biological need.

This same ability also meant that they made love for twelve hours straight. Even in the middle of a battlefield surrounded by rotting corpses, the newfound lovers did not let their handiwork disturb them as they did every filthy thing they could think of and then some. Considering one had taught a literal porn star everything he knew, Cherri had an enormous well to draw from.

Once they were finally done putting orgies to shame, Demencia pulled out a pack of cigarettes and decided to follow the age-old cliché of smoking after sex. She did break the mold, however, by lighting it with her finger.

“Aaaaaaaahhhh…” swooned the draconic girl as she took a puff, “That was…wooooow…”

Cherri just snickered at her. “Well, it’s nice to know I haven’t lost my touch.”

“When’s the last time you had sex?”

“Three weeks ago. But even for me, that was pretty incredible!” The cyclops then pulled out a bottle of wine from her hammerspace boobs and let the gentle buzz wash over her, getting an odd look from her partner in the process.

“You…drinking something _other_ than hard liquor?”

“What? Every now and again I like to have _some_ class! Plus, I’ve never seen you smoke anything less than hardcore drugs before! Where’d you even get a pack to begin with?”

“I’ve been saving this…”

“Saving for…Wait, no way! You…a _virgin_?!”

“What can I say? I was never interested in anyone but Black Hat until now…”

“Soooo…Does that mean you don’t lov-”

 Cherri only got that far when Demencia shot her with a sawed-off shotgun straight in the eye. While the damage was quickly reversed, the answer was clear.

“Dumb question, then,” she continued, “So, why are suddenly into me?”

“Well, actual friends are hard to come by as a villain. Plus, while Black Hat is the single greatest abomination the universe has ever known…I know I couldn’t do half the shit I’ve done here around him without pissing him off. And while I’m every flavor of crazy, I know better than anyone that when he’s genuinely pissed you _run._ ”

“I know the pain, sister.”

“So, having someone who’s not only super crazy and evil, but you can also be yourself around is… really nice. Plus, you are drop-dead gorgeous so it wasn’t hard for me to get the hots for you considering that I already liked you as a friend.”

“It’s so weird hearing you actually make sense…but hey, given the crowd I hang with, I’m no stranger to weird sex. I mean, who knew you could do so much kinky shit with a tail?”

Demencia giggled as she swished her new appendage. Despite having it for less than a day, she proved how versatile it could be. Before the two could start banging again, though, she noticed the PDA they received laying on the ground a few feet away. After taking one last puff and discarding her cigarette, she walked over and activated the device to find a prerecorded message from their new ally Tom Sheldon.

“Hola, amigas! Sorry to run off on ya like that, but I wanted to give y’all some space while ya…work out yer differences, so to speak!”

A few seconds of him chuckling got Cherri’s attention. She finished her wine and stood next to her new girlfriend for the rest of the message.

“So, once you got your buns in gear again, I’ll be waitin’ to show ya to where I’ve set up a new base on Panau thanks to the Agency. The coordinates’ll come up as soon as the message is done, so hop to it!”

Sure enough, a GPS program opened up with directions pointing towards a spot on the west coast of Panau’s main island.

“Well, looks like it finally time to get back to business,” sighed Cherri as she launched a grapping hook at the ground, “Let’s go see what our new partner has for us!”

Demencia revealed her dragon wings, now conveniently matching the rest of her green-scaled body, and took to the skies as Cherri catapulted herself forward with her hooks. After one of their more orderly trips across Panau, meaning they only got in a firefight once or twice as opposed to once every ten minutes, they arrived at a two-story brick house sitting on a pristine view of the ocean and the western half of the island in the distance.

“What is this place, his vacation home?” asked Demencia as she walked up to the last thing she ever expected to see in Panau; a green and white RV parked around the back of the house.

“One second, ladies! Gotta get some refreshments for the guests!” said Tom from the recreational vehicle. He emerged with a silver platters with two margaritas on it.

“Welcome to my little slice o’ heaven, amigas! Glad you could make it!”

Each of the girls took a cocktail from his tray and eyed them curiously.

“What? Are we gonna blow up a dictator or invite him over for a cocktail party?” asked Cherri sarcastically.

“Take a little sip o’ that before you judge!”

Both of the ladies complied and were quickly hit by a massive wave of energy far beyond what even the strongest of mixed drinks could pull off.

“HOLY FUCKING SHIT!” exclaimed Demencia as she slammed the rest of the drink down in one gulp, “What’s in this stuff?! Raw gasoline and ecstasy?!”

“A little stimulant drug that’s been outlawed since the ‘40s, but I happen to know the right partner in the business to get some! Thought I’d give you girls a little taste of what your rewards will be with this good ol’ boy as your supplier!”

“Gramps, I could almost blow you for this because HOT DAMN!” shouted Cherri as she enjoyed the rush for herself. Once the two finally calmed down, they were surprised when he pulled a pair of handheld grenade launchers for the two of them.

“And I got gifts too! These puppies can hold eight grenades at a time, but just one o’ these shots should blow any group of baddies you meet higher than a fighter jet trying to reach the moon!”

“Sweeeeet!” She picked up the weapon for herself and admired it for a moment before shoving it down her cleavage to join the rest of her cache.

“So now that I’ve proven I can get the goods, I wanna get some intel on who I’m workin’ with. Tell me your story.”

And so the duo actually recalled everything from the moment when Cherri was accidentally summoned by Black Hat’s latest product. From there, the two realized how quickly they went from literally at each other’s throats to best friends to something more just recently. By the end of it all, Tom was taking a sip of beer as he processed everything.

“Sweet Jesus in a Cadillac, that’s nuts,” he chuckled, “Pretty sure you two would be all the rage state-side! Course, every Christian in the world would either try burnin’ ya at the stake or claiming everything they know is a lie…”

“I’d pay to see that!” laughed Cherri.

“But all in all, you two’ve done a mighty fine job breaking Panay’s regime. Right now, I’d say you’re about halfway done.”

“Awwww! But there’s so many more things to make go ka-blammo!” whined Demencia as she started sucking on a beer bottle of her own like an infant.

“Don’t worry, y’all still have plenty of chaos to cause! Plus now you got lil’ old me to bring whatever toys you want! Just use that PDA o’ yours to ring me up and I’ll bring the party favors!”

“While I don’t mind having more partners-in-crime, what’s in all this for you?” asked Cherri as she casually started rummaging around her cleavage for a vial of meth.

“What, can’t a red-blooded American just wanna defend the principles of democracy and all that jazz?”

Both demons stopped what they were doing and just stared at him with the most disbelieving expression they could make.

“Okay, the sooner Panay’s out of power, the sooner I can go back to eatin’ cheeseburgers and bass fishing instead of working on some totalitarian island in the middle of the Indian Ocean.”

Both ladies nodded, much happier with this explanation than the altruistic shite he tried to feed them. Tom then stood up and headed towards his RV.

“Alright then, chicitas, the house is yours if you wanna rest or you can get out there or you can skedaddle and start wiping Baby’s ass some more, I’m gonna leave that to you. I’m gonna turn in for the night, but I’ve still got ya covered!”

And with that, the American agent shut the door leaving the demonic duo to their own devices. Demencia then revealed her wings as she looked out to the water.

“What’re you so eager to fly for?” asked Cherri.

“I want a boat. We’ve stolen a lot of cars and a few choppers, but not a boat.”

“Why a boat now?”

“Do we really _need_ a reason at this point?”

Cherri just chuckled at that as she grabbed a hold of Demencia’s waist as her partner took off looking for a boat to steal for fun. They were soon rewarded when they saw a speedy green motorboat with a machine gun mounted behind the driver. Both of the men onboard were wearing red vests and had yet to notice the pair flying overhead.

Their poor eyesight would soon be their downfall as Cherri dropped on board with a steel javelin in her hands which she wasted no time gutting the gunner with. Before the driver had a chance to retaliate, she sent a lightning bolt straight at his head. She then calmly strode to the front of the vessel while Demencia landed and began cooking the gunner’s arm with her flames.

“There. Now we have a boat to fuck around with, so now what?” asked Cherri as she steered them down a river.

“What else?! We blow more shit up!”

And from there, the two spent the night running their seaworthy tool ragged as they tore up the coastline. Whether it was with the onboard machine gun or with the stockpile of heavy weapons they had on hand, they happily sunk any boat in their path with any other Panauan navy ship being demolished thanks to their fire and lightning. Sure, there were several fishing vessels lost in the process, but at least they were not the idiotic government troops who blew up their own boats by driving straight onto land. They got several laughs watching the crashes, though!

Their fun only continued when they ended up finding an oil rig far away just as the clock hit midnight. Drooling at the kind of havoc they could wreak there, the two abandoned their boat once it finally ran out of gas, and then promptly blowing it up with grenades for good measure, and made their way to the massive metallic structure. The two landed on the catwalk just above the water and were quickly spotted by an elite guard doing his rounds.

“Hey, stop right there!” he said pointing his assault rifle at them.

Instead of a verbal response, Demencia just charged at him with her claws bared. She was hit by several dozen bullets, but those barely tickled her before the damage was healed over. When she finally reached him, she whipped him with her tail right in the privates. With him now crying as he tried to squeak out a plea for help, Cherri finished him with a revolver shot to the head.

As the gunfire rang out into the night, they knew whatever cover they had was gone and the fun was truly about to begin. The two climbed the staircases up to the main platform even as more troops tried shooting them down. Only one of them was smart enough to try retreating as he watched the demonesses slice and shoot his comrades to unrecognizable bits. Just as he got to the top of the stairs, though, a grappling hook was sunk into his back. He got one high-pitched scream out before Cherri reeled him in and silenced him with dagger to the throat.

This quickly got the guards on the platform on their guard. Having just witnessed what looked like a scene straight from a horror movie, they actually showed a modicum of strategy and pointing their guns at whatever just dragged a man to his doom. Instead of a monster emerging, though, they heard what sounds like giggling and the sounds of a couple kissing.

“Fuck me, woman, you are insatiable!” spoke Cherri, completely bewildering all the guards, “Can’t we wait until we’re done here before we do that?”

“What? I thought you liked getting freaky in places like this!” pouted Demencia, “We spent half a day fucking in the middle of a battlefield, right?”

“Yeah, but even I know that business and pleasure are two separate things! I may be a slut of the highest caliber, but I’m also a slut who understands there’s work to be done first. Priorities, you know?”

“Fiiiiiiiine…But when we’re done, you are gonna do that swirly thing with your tongue again! I never knew you could see colors without drugs!”

“Whatever you say, psycho. Now then, I think there’s some maggots listening in on us. Want to teach them not to eavesdrop?”

“Absolutely!”

And with that cheery send-off, Demencia flew out into the open with a shotgun in her hands and her signature mace held by her tail. Those who avoided being blasted into giblets got smashed through by her medieval melee weapon until the resemble jelly more than human beings. When Cherri strolled on deck, having slashed the throats of the few soldiers trying to run for cover, she placed a finger on her chin and inspected the gruesome scene before her.

“Hmmmmm, impressive work, but there’s still something missing…”

“Confetti and a beer bong?” asked Demencia as she casually started juggling grenades.

“Tempting, but no…”

Cherri looked to the top of the rig where a massive drilling tower stood like a beacon in the middle of the ocean. She grappled her way up, electrocuting and shooting several guards she passed on the different levels of the rig, and took out several triggered explosives from her bottomless cleavage space.

“Would you kindly do the honors?” she asked sweetly. Demencia was all too quick to comply.

“My base instincts approve! BOOM-BOOM!”

One push of the detonator later and several explosions took out the tower’s legs and sent the whole metal construct crashing down. The civilian workers panicked and ran for cover while the remaining soldiers aimed their guns at Cherri who was busy admiring her handiwork.

“Let me guess…I’m under arrest?” she cheekily asked the guards.

Several bullets already flying at her was all the answer she needed as she leapt down to their level with a pair of trench knives already in hand. Not wanting to be left out of the action, Demencia lobbed fireballs from above and sent many incoming enemies to a painful, burning death.

“Well, that was a fun way to spend the morning!” remarked Cherri as she picked the firearms off several of the fallen Panauan forces.

“Does this mean more sexy fun times?”

“Later, you pervert, but what you said about boats got me thinking something…”

“About how convoluted it is that a dictator who acquired power so suddenly has such a level of military power that multiple global superpowers are getting involved in a struggle for oil?”

“No, I’ve just come accept that weirdness. I was thinking we haven’t hijacked any planes either…”

“Deal! Let’s fly!”

“Not quite…” She pulled out the PDA she received from Tom. “I’m curious to try out our new friend’s services on the way.”

One quick call later and the two had a bright red, top-of-the-line speedboat at their disposal with along with a brand new pack of C4 to go with it. Cherri noticed on the climb up the rig how there were gas tanks all over the walls apparently there for filling. Seeing such potential destruction left undone would have brought a tear to her blood-red eye so she left behind a parting gift. With one final push, all ten of the fuel tanks along the rig exploded in one final blaze of glory while Demencia steered them back towards the mainland.

When they arrived on the beach, ramming their shiny new boat into the sand at top speed so it exploded on impact, the two took a brief moment to do a few rows of coke and make out on the sand before flying off to the nearest military airport. One trip on stolen motorcycles later, the two arrived at the entrance to a complex with several hangers, multiple huge runways and several cinderblock buildings in between. They also noticed another colonel wearing the same special red armor as the last one along with a squad of elite soldiers wearing special blue berets.

“Hm, we need something to make this feel special…,” thought Cherri, “I don’t want President Pussy to see us as predictable.”

“What, we should just walk in and ask for a plane?” asked Demencia as she hanged from the fence near the entrance upside-down.

Cherri, much to her surprise, decided to take the suggestion seriously and just casually walked in unarmed. She walked into the nearest hangar where several guards were overseeing a small jet plane off. She waltzed right up to one of them and asked with all the politeness she could muster if she could momentarily borrow the plane for a quick jaunt around the countryside with the promise that the craft would be in showroom condition when she returned it.

The guard then had the _brilliant_ idea to give her access to the plane in exchange if she followed him back to his bunker to look at his “prized sword.”

“Okay, three problems with that. One, I’ve polished enough swords in my lifetime that I can tell just by looking at you you’re nothing special. Two, I’m actually in a committed relationship right now so I’d need to ask my girlfriend first. And three…”

A bowie knife emerged from her shin and she slashed the guard in the throat so fast he did not have time to even say ouch.

“…I don’t do necrophilia. Now, you got some BDSM stuff, call me!”

The other guards opened fire, but that meant little as she sent ran helter-skelter shooting off sparks of lightning in one hand while stabbing schmucks with the other until she was alone with the plane. The pilot was the only one smart enough to realize the literal demon might just be dangerous. Cherri happily leaped into the cockpit, fired up the thrusters and made her way onto the runway. After a brief few seconds taking off she was quickly ascending into the sky until she noticed several bullets trying to take her down courtesy of the colonel and his boys.

Thankfully, Demencia was already on the case and was not about to let them ruin her girlfriend’s fun. After setting one on fire from a distance, she quickly got their full attention. The colonel and three remaining berets turned their assault rifles on her, which as per the norm, meant jack-all to her as her body healed the damage instantly. She hooked her tail around the neck of the colonel as she flew by and used him as a blunt weapon against his own men, beating them with his own body until his neck snapped from the force.

The berets were stunned by the loss of their superior officer, but they could not dwell on it for long before Demencia slashed two of them to pieces with her claws and the third was killed by a burst of fire breath.

It was not long after she was done with them that a massive crash rang throughout the base as Cherri’s plane barreled straight into the runway. When Demencia flew over to the new crater, she found her lover none the worse for wear even with fifteen guys shooting her in the back.

“Hey babe, turns out I fucking suck at flying planes!” she chuckled as a bullet burst her eye.

“Huh, who knew? You did try flying sober, right?”

“Fuck no! Where’s the fun in that? I took a few shots of tequila before taking off!”

Demencia actually placed her hands on hips and looked skeptical. “Really?”

“Okay, I downed the entire bottle in one go!”

“Oh, thank goodness! For a second there, I was worried you were getting depressed, not drinking like you should. You need some help with those guys still trying to shoot you?”

“Yeah, this is getting old.”

The two quickly pulled out machine guns of their own and quickly took down five of them. When the rest tried to scatter, the two charged in with the cyclops slashing them apart with a massive medieval claymore while the dragoness settled for getting headshots with a submachine gun.

The two then found another hanger where a full-fledged fighter jet was just gearing up for takeoff. Before it could get onto the runway, though, he was stopped by Demencia yanking open the hatch and dropping him on the tarmac. Cherri grappled onto the plane as her lover hit the ignition and quickly took to the skies at ridiculous speeds.

The two then spent the next several hours playing with their latest toy. They were extremely happy to find that the plane was not only equipped with two bottomless machine guns, but also a pair of rocket launchers with endless ammunition! Many people on the ground were wondering why a military aircraft was doing loops and spelling out curse words in contrails, but frankly it was an improvement in their eyes.

The hell-spawn finally ran the plane out of fuel so they made a landing at an air base in the middle of a desert. Given that they were flying a million-dollar piece of military hardware, they figured there was only one way to properly land the jet: holding down the triggers for the rockets and Gatling guns while flying straight towards a massive communications tower and give the latest batch of unlucky droogs an unforgettable welcome!

After they reformed from their latest kaboom, the two freefell to the ground letting off as much fire and lightning as they could. Several soldiers who had the surprisingly component idea to shoot them out of the air were quickly incinerated and/or electrocuted into unrecognizable piles. Once they landed at terminal velocity and shook off the damage, they immediately found themselves back-to-back surrounded by armed soldiers.

“Demencia, I’m been curious about something,” asked Cherri conversationally.

“Why they sell hot dogs in packs of ten, but sell hot dog buns in packs of eight?”

“No, that’s just a con like those Nigerian prince scams. I was wondering with how many powers we both have now why not try combining them?”

The draconic girl got a horrifying smile on her face as she turned around and picked up Cherri by her legs and spun her around as fast as she could while the cyclops focused on the black bands around her wrists. The grappling hooks came out as per the norm, but then she actually concentrated on them and was rewarded when several small metal blades emerged on the lines turning them into whip-swords.

This new combination proved deadly for the horde of soldiers around as no matter how many bullets they fired, the tornado of death expanded and quickly began shredding all of them to pieces. Demencia even started spinning on her heels and moving them around in a wider circle until the fifty soldiers around them were sliced to meaty chunks.

Once they finally stopped spinning, the two casually strolled through the base finishing off the last few soldiers until they found a surprisingly comfortable lounge with a velvet couch and a bottle of imported whiskey on a table.

“You know that whole combo thing you brought up just gave me a great idea…” said Demencia with a lecherous grin. The two wasted no time liquoring themselves up, yanking off each other’s clothes and seeing how many ways heat and electricity could improve sex. Granted, there were a handful of times they would get carried away and let loose a full-on fireball or lightning bolt. They were naturally fine, but the building looked more like a war had come through rather than two immortal demons looking for ways to spice up their sex life. They eventually fell asleep on each other, for once letting all the excitement of the day tire them out and enjoying a rare moment of tranquility in the wake of their rampage.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With the girls now having tackled land, air, and sea, next time Tom calls them in for a big job! Tune in to see another round of insane demons versus a military full of disposal goons!


	8. Mountain Rescue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew, it's been a long time since I've updated this one, and for that I apologize. Got caught up in so many other things, but I never forgot this chaotic little thrill ride! And now, after Hazbin Hotel has made its glorious debut (Alongside a surprising, but very welcome sister series called Helluva Boss!), I bring you the next installment of this mad little tale! Enjoy!

When the demonic duo awoke from their little nap, they noticed none other than Tom Sheldon sitting in the room. While other women may have been offended by a man having snuck in on them after doing the deed, they both just shrugged it off. Considering Cherri had done her fair share of porn in the past and Demencia occasionally modeled for NSFW fan art for her social media followers, neither one of them saw nudity as much of a taboo.

“Rise and shine, ladies! Hope y’all enjoyed yer private time, ‘cuz now it’s time to suit up for a big job!”

The girls quickly redressed themselves and were led out of the half-destroyed desert base into Tom’s RV that was being chauffeured by an unnamed local and soon the three were sitting around a small table while they were being driven back to the main island. A six-pack of high-grade German beer and a plate of freshly grilled hot-dogs sat between the three.

“So, you finally got something specific for us?” asked Cherri as she casually pulled out a chunk of crystal meth and started crushing it in her hand to add to her beverage.

“Yep, and it’s a matter of life or death! One of my local contacts, an older broad named Jade Tan, has been caught by Panay and it being brought in for interrogation.”

“A rescue mission?” thought Demencia aloud, “Does that mean we have to escort her somewhere? Because no one likes those parts in video games!”

“Nah, don’t you worry about that! I’ll be there to pick her up as soon as ya get her. I know y’all don’t need any dead weight slowin’ you down.”

The dragon girl relaxed as she downed her fourth hot dog. She then not-so-subtly used her tail to pull her lover closer and start making out. Before they could get anywhere with that, though, they arrived back at Tom’s base where they found several black boxes waiting for them.

“Tan’s being held in a huge facility in the mountains. Might just be the biggest base on Panau.”

Both of them got excited hearing that. Think of all the carnage they could make at a place like that! They could just imagine what kind of new power they would get after this!

“Since I figured y’all would be goin’ up against something so big you might want a fresh reload of gear. Help yourself!”

Inside the boxes was a fully-loaded firearm, five of each of the smaller handguns and a two-handed weapon for each of them along with multiple reloads of ammo for all of it. Much to their delight, it also included two dozen frag grenades and a dozen rounds of C4. They two did reflect that they have been using guns less and less with the assortment of powers now at their disposal. Add that to the whole combining powers trick still in mind, they figured they could easily find a use for all of this.

“Now I’ll be on yer PDA the whole time so I’ll know right off the bat when you grab Jade. The second you need anything, give me a call!”

And with that said, the southerner sent them on their way with the base’s coordinates on their handheld device. The demonesses wasted no time as Cherri used her grappling hooks to launch herself from one part of the mountain to the other while Demencia flew by her side. For once they did not dawdle, banter or stop to cause random mischief. They actually headed into the barren wilderness as they wanted to ensure they would reach their destination as fast as physically possible. They even went the entire way completely sober! _That’s_ how determined they were!

The tropical foliage eventually faded as they reached the snowy summits once again and followed the coordinates. Even as the passed by towns and the occasional gas station, they remained as focused as ever. For the first time since they arrived, they felt like they had a sense of urgency and purpose greater than just their own merriment.

The duo arrived at the base, but quickly found that calling the place a complex would be more apt. Four different walled garrisons were spread out around multiple acres connected by snowy roads and in one case a cable car line. Fuel tanks of all shapes and sizes were everywhere, two ginormous communication masts dominated the skyline and they could spot a massive black hangar sitting over a frozen lake. For many this would be a terrifying fortress of military might that would need a small army to properly overcome.

For Demencia and Cherri, though, it was a thing of beauty. Vehicles lying about everywhere, hundreds of soldiers to confront and endless opportunities for explosions. The duo were right to save all their resources for this because they knew it would be a marathon of glorious, gruesome carnage that would put all their past feats to shame. The two made their way to the nearest quadrant and spotted two guards keeping patrol from a lookout tower. They exchanged a tender kiss before each of them pulled out a sniper rifle and aimed for the guards’ heads.

Two headshots later and the game had officially begun. Demencia flew on top of the tower to keep sniping incoming soldiers while Cherri landed inside the wall and charged ahead with a pair of machetes. The alert had officially sounded, but the Panauan soldiers dumb enough to heed the call were quickly taken down. Within the first five minutes, they had taken down almost thirty soldiers.

The two charged ahead as more soldiers emerged from the various barracks and buildings around them to try and stop them, but they were also dealt with using grenades, fireballs, shuriken or a grappling hook to the privates.

“Okay, are there any researchers or staff here?” asked Cherri, “Who feeds and trains all these guys?”

“Less talk, more skull-bashing!” shouted Demencia as she literally beat a man to death with a pistol. While most pragmatic villains frowned on pistol-whipping, the rules do not apply when you have a veritable unlimited supply of guns.

With another several dozen bodies behind them, they advanced only to find a roadblock of several off-road vehicles and motorcycles lined up to form a barricade. They counted at least twenty-five soldiers in between them and the rest of the base and all of them were poised to kill…

…And that meant Cherri and Demencia had a wonderful opportunity to see what would happen when they combined fire and lightning! Each of them held out a hand channeling their respective element and when put together, it became a ball of pure energy.

With a combined thrust they shot their new projectile at the blockade and were not disappointed as it caused every single vehicle to explode and left all the grunts before them in hundreds of pieces each.

“Logic is our bitch!” cheered Cherri as they rushed out of the first quadrant and into the open roads connecting the bases together. They ran full-tilt into the next garrison and quickly dealt with the guards on the towers with several grenades. Rather than just blowing up the guard inside, the entire top of the structure was blown to smithereens and rained debris onto the unlucky guards who tried to halt their progress.

The never ending onslaught of militants kept pouring in, emerging from every corner and futilely trying to pump more lead into the demonesses. All they ended up doing was giving the ladies targets as they went a bit old-school and turned the place into a shooting gallery. For once they limited themselves to guns only and saw who was the better markswoman even keeping score with double points for headshots. By the time they had cleared out the area, Cherri’s better aim and precision gave her the edge and won out with 34 kills with 18 headshots for a total of 70 versus Demencia with 47 kills with only 7 headshots. As the victor, Cherri got to choose how to blow up a pair of satellite stations sitting at the corner of the base. She opted for getting a pair of trucks up onto the dishes and then blowing the whole lot up with her classic bombs.

Why did she bring the trucks? Because Panauan vehicles are less for transportation and more a portable explosive that will detonate if someone blinks too loudly around them. She wanted to give a little extra pizzazz and what better way to do that than to mix broken glass and burning rubber into exploding metal and concrete?

With half the base’s main sections now kaput, they moved into area number three where they found the two towering masts just begging to be toppled. First, though, they had to deal with yet another platoon of troops who did not know when to quit. This time they decided to get up close and personal and relied solely on their melee skills. Demencia literally tore into them with claws, teeth and tail to the point where Cherri was almost tempted to drop what she was doing and start masturbating to the destruction.

Luckily for her what she was doing was giving her girlfriend a show to watch with her own carnal display. Every person in her sight was getting sliced and beaten to death as she summoned a small armory worth of weapons from her body. Whether it was ninja weapons, a replica of the Master Sword because irony or a sledgehammer as tall as she was no one was spared. It also helped that from years of gang fights she had no inhibitions about playing dirty whether that meant chucking snow in a soldier’s face, hitting below the belt or distracting them by her top “accidentally” falling to reveal her cleavage.

Once they were all finished, the destructive duo stood before each other in the aftermath of their latest bloodbath.

“You want to fuck like jackrabbits, don’t you?” asked Cherri.

“Uh-huh.”

“But we have an actual time limit for once…”

“Right.”

“And we have a responsibility to live up to and-”

“Given normal gaming conventions we can technically putz around all day and Jade will still be fine. There’s no active time limit or chase sequence so as far as reality is concerned, we’ve got no major obligation.”

Cherri blinked, processing everything Demencia just said, before literally jumping onto her and making out. After forty minutes of debauchery in the snow, the two finally got everything out of their systems and continued on their way. They headed up by the cable car where the last area of the base along with the huge hangar stood over the rest of the area. Now that they were reminded that the rules of reality more or less did not apply to them anymore, the duo got far more creative once they reached the final quadrant.

Demencia pulled out matching pistols and went completely above and beyond with her gunplay. She would fire enough rounds to empty the gun, chuck the sidearm into the air, claw out the nearest soldier’s face, then catch the gun and reload it in five seconds before going airborne and breathing fire onto anything that moves. Then she would pull out a machine gun and rather than shoot directly at the guards she would ricochet the shots off the walls so they would always hit in the back of the head. Then she got her hands on of the bottomless Gatling guns and fired it at anything in sight to the tune of “Sweet Victory.” Why? Because her cartoon gods and the author demand it!

That left Cherri with a chance to get back to basics and use her signature explosives while also seeing just how many ways you could use said explosives in conjunction with her other powers. Whether it was whacking them with a baseball bat, infusing them with lightning so they exploded with an electric charge or just taking advantage of her infinite regeneration and shoving the lit pyrotechnics into people’s faces. What would normally be a kamikaze maneuver in her continually regrowing hands turned into a bloody bonanza that made her laugh every time with how the soldiers screamed and cried as they realized the end was nigh.

With the last quadrant down, and having far more liberty to operate, made their way up towards the final part of the base overlooking the rest. They faced a few pursuing helicopters on the way, but they were dealt with thanks to fire blasts and a few well-tossed grenades. It did strike them as remarkably fast, though, with how their mission was going.

Before long, they arrived at the literal top of the base where they looked down and happily saw the smoke rising from their previous exploits. Strangely enough, though, as they walked along the elevated pathway and platforms around the massive hangar they met no resistance. There was not a single guard in sight until they found an open bay door near the top which they headed towards.

“Ah, there you are,” spoke an incredibly snide voice over the base’s intercom, “At long last, I spy the wretches who have been toying with the Panauan military.”

“Baby Panay!” exclaimed Demencia like a cartoon sleuth, “You and your mangy mutt won’t get away with this!”

“Goddamn, do you ever stop with these jokes?”

“I get in a really bad mood when someone burns my toast,” she admitted, “Then it leaves a bitter aftertaste in my mouth when I eat someone that’s just the woooorst!”

“A-Anyway,” continued Panay, trying to sound dramatic despite the interruption, “Your rebel friend is no longer in the base and you have failed. You may have damaged my empire, but this will be the last time you interfere with my-”

“Get on with it, fucknugget!” yelled Cherri, “We get it already! ‘We are complete idiots! I am so high and mighty! All hail my swagger! I swear my cock is really that big!’ Just pull out your doomsday device and let me shoot something!”

Instead of replying, a shadowy figure leapt out of the hanger behind the two. Three things immediately drew their attention about their newest opponent. One: It was a ninja. An honest-to-God assassin covered head-to-toe in dark blue robes with only the eyes exposed. Two: The ninja was _female_. Considering Panay’s army seemed to be the competing to be the world’s largest sausage party before, this was even more surprising than her being a kunoichi. Three: She had a submachine gun on her hip, though, that seemed pretty mundane by comparison.

“Ha! Just one ninja? Is that all you’ve got?” taunted Cherri. She was answered with many more shinobi appearing out of puffs of smoke until there was twenty warriors before them all pointing firearms at them.

“Much better!” agreed the demonesses as they leapt into battle. Their joy kept growing when they found out that the ninjas could actually handle their weapons! They made smart decisions about how to use cover, ambush the pair and even showed the unique ability to vanish into puffs of smoke when they started taking too much damage. To most fighters this fight would be hopelessly one-sided as the band of kunoichi combined the stealth of ninjutsu with the lethality of guns.

To Demencia and Cherri, though, it was a phenomenal change of pace that got their blood pumping. They could practically feel the new abilities they would get from this, but they still relished the new challenge in front of them. They loved the chance to get creative right back as the femme fatale army fell one by one. Some fell to old-fashioned stabbings, shootings and beatings, but others got unique deaths.

One fortunate woman went to reload her gun, only to find an active grenade thrown in her hand instead. Once her limb was blown clean off, Cherri finished her by taking her gun and charging it with electricity. She became the very first person to die by electric pistol whipping! Another one found Demencia setting her robes on fire. As she hurriedly tried putting the flames out, she found herself rolling straight into the lizard girl’s arms who flew her into the wall of the base and ground her against it until she was paste. That brave soul would be immortalized by the mile-long streak of blood painted on the base’s front.

After several minutes of carnage, the final ninja fell to a pair of sniper shots to the chest. The destructive duo were not sure of how much time had passed, but they felt invigorated beyond belief.

“I think this calls for something special…” said Cherri as she reached into her boobs and found the Ular-brand mushroom drug. Demencia brought out the highest-proof booze she had and soon the two found themselves as high as stars. In their drug-fueled craze that would make even drug lords scared for their lives, however, they were interrupted by Baby Panay’s voice.

“Well then,” droned the dictator, “You survived my ninjas, but your American comrade won’t survive being dragged to a Panauan war prison and-”

Rather than be concerned with that, the girls were too busy gawking at clouds or licking their guns in a stupor. From his remote base, the diminutive ruler had to wonder how _these_ were the insurgents destroying his nation.

“Ooooh…” groaned Demencia as she finally regained her footing, “That might have finally been too much.”

“Oof, no shit,” griped Cherri, “I’m pretty sure I almost ate a bullet.”

“My tail was on fire and I had spiders in my pancreas.”

“I honest-to-Antichrist thought I was a pony.”

“You want pony OCs? I’m sure I can find you something online.”

“Just be sure to keep safe-search on. I’ve literally seen children get murdered over candy and there are _still_ parts of the Internet that make me wanna take a shower.”

“ENOUGH!” screamed Panay, “If you two won’t take my threats seriously, I’ll just have to kill Jade Tan!”

The duo looked over the rail of the base to find huge cracks emerging in the frozen lake. The sounds were deafening, but they were more surprised to see a massive black submarine emerge. A small fleet of jeeps also rolled out from the bays at the bottom of the base and quickly put two and two together.

“They’ve got Jade in those cars!” said Cherri.

“Fuck, now we’ve got actual stakes! We’ll have to save the scissoring for later,” replied Demencia as she brought out her wings and flew into action. Cherri followed behind, rappelling from side to side and healing off whatever damage she did to her body. They were on top of the motorcade in a few seconds and were quickly met with several armed guard peeking out of the sides of the cars to fire at them.

Even with the need to be careful for once, the demons were more than up for the task. Cherri summoned several throwing knives and landing fatal blows on the guards while Demencia showed her firearm skills by using a single pistol and aiming squarely at the head. Soon they were at the main car were an Asian woman was tied to the front seat. Again, not wanting to risk the hostage, Cherri acted stealthily as she yanked open the driver-side door and just pulled the driver out of the car. Once she was behind the wheel, the cyclops steered the jeep away from the submarine and safely towards the open ice while Demencia threw flames at the remaining cars.

With one last ka-boom, their pursuers were no more and Cherri pulled over with a very grateful Jade Tan fully unharmed.

“Oh, thank you ladies so much!” she swooned, “I thought that lunatic Panay would have my head by now!”

“Don’t mention it,” boasted Demencia, “We’ve been at this hero gig for a while now.”

“Um, bullshit!” retorted Cherri, “We’ve caused millions of dollars of property damage, showed almost no regard for humans safety and our body count is somewhere in the thousands! How in Lilith’s freaky sex dungeon are we the good guys?”

“Because if we really wanted to we could take over the entire world in less than a week with our powers.”

The blonde realized, once again, her insane girlfriend had a point. Before she could dwell on that further, a helicopter came into landing with a very happy Tom Sheldon aboard.

“Well I’ll be a crushed car at a demolition derby, you loco bambinas actually pulled it off! No offense, but I didn’t think subtly was your style.”

“It isn’t,” assured Demencia, “We still shot up at least a hundred guys to get here.”

“Please, back in Washington, pulling a number o’ bodies that small would get you a medal. Now then, I’m gonna fly Jade here to my safe house so she can let her trail run dry. Now that all the hard work’s done, y’all can go back to slammin’ vodka shots while shooting up garrisons for funsies. Happy trails, pardners!”

And so the humans flew away back to the jungle while the ladies stayed in the tundra. Just as they were about to start making their way back, though, they felt a familiar tingling all over their bodies.

“What, really?! New powers for all that?” said Cherri as her body settled down, “It feels like that last one was pretty tame compared to finding Tom.”

“Uhhhhh…” said Demencia, looking no different this time, “I think our new toys are for them…”

She then pointed up into the sky where she saw over a dozen transport helicopters hovering over them. Parachutes began to fill their view as at soldier after soldier jumped from the chopper and seemed to be ready for battle.

“Okay, now we’ve got targets, but what can we do now?” asked Cherri. As if answering her own question, though, she looked at one intact car from their chase and held her hand out towards it. One of the tires then flew off and landed straight in her grasp as if by magic.

“No way. No fucking way.”

Cherri then sent the tire spinning around her head with just a thought. With another thought, it stopped on a dime and began bouncing off the ice like a rubber ball.

“Holy shit, I have telekinesis!”

“Are you okay?” asked a curious Demencia, “You actually sound like you’re ready to squee.”

“Because telekinesis is the most broken power ever! I can move anything just by looking at it! In fact…”

Demencia’s dress then ripped off her body. “Okay, _now_ you’ve got me interested!”

“Trust me, I’ve already got enough stuff planned for twenty pornos once we’re done here. What’s your new shtick?”

Demencia glanced at one of the schmucks who tried shooting at her during the chase. Like her lover before her, she lifted her hand and suddenly the blood flowing out of his wounds stopped. It then all levitated and flew into her hand.

“Controlling blood?” asked Cherri, “Seems like a weaker version of my power.”

Demencia, however, was giving a grin that would terrify even the craziest of slasher villains. She formed the blood in her hand into a spike and sent it flying into the one survivor of their chase who was trying to crawl to safety. The spike drilled into his face, and caused more blood to squirt out in turn. After just that one mook, she had five spikes floating around her.

“Okay, never mind, that’s fucking broken.” Cherri then looked up to see the oncoming storm of soldiers, some of which had already started firing down at them.

“Let’s see how many new pussies we can make…”

“Aw, I’d love that for a date!” cooed Demencia, “I’ll get the bedroom ready once we head back home.”

“I can’t wait…”

Demencia opened her wings with her new blood spikes in tow along with a submachine gun in hand and soon the falling force of enemies was quickly decimated as she used all of her powers in tandem with amazing ferocity. Burn a hole in one man’s parachute so he would plummet to his death, then shoot two more to kingdom come with her gun, then use their blood to form needles that would puncture the next man’s throat open and gain more blood for her to manipulate. The only concern she had now might have been that she was hogging all the fun, taking out every guy in sight and leaving Cherri bored below on the ice.

Thankfully, one look down put her worries to rest. Cherri was getting plenty of time to play with her newest power thanks to a deluge of soldiers pouring out of the nuclear submarine. It seemed Panay had actually a backup squadron in case his hostage escaped, but they were far too late. They instead proved Cherri’s point that telekinesis really was broken to an absurd degree. Almost anything the cyclops willed to happen worked. Stopping a barrage of bullets in mid-air and firing them back at the gunners? Yep! Using her mind to hold her weapons so she could wield eight pistols at once? Worked like a charm! Simply picking up a guy with her power and slamming him into his buddies like a fleshy wrecking ball? So funny it made her almost pee herself! Between her psychic onslaught and Demencia dropping bodies like literal flies, there was enough blood to turn the lake red if it ever thawed.

Once the carrier copters finally retreated and the submarine returned underwater, the two reunited and made out furiously.

“Okay…” swooned Demencia as her heands ran along Cherri’s body, “Forget a bedroom. Let’s just find an alley and start fucking like jackrabbits!”

“Oh, I’m extremely tempted, but there’s one thing left here to take care of.”

They both looked at the massive communications towers just begging to be brought down. Demencia did the honors as she gathered the hundreds of gallons of blood she spilt and concentrated it all into a fifty-foot wide crimson sawblade. She took to the sky with her gigantic weapon and with one thrust of her arms, the massive saw spun clean through the base of the metal towers like paper. The beams groaned as their support was gone and fell like two red-and-white trees and flattened several buildings under them, the entire mountain shaking from the impact.

“TIIIIIIIIIIMBEEEEEEEEER!” cried the demoness as she flew back to her girlfriend, only to be amazed to see her floating off the ground.

“Yep, turns out I can use it on myself! Let’s go celebrate with airborne sex!”

“And whiskey-cocaine body shots!”

“Holy shit, you need to come home with me. With a webcam porn site, we’d be billionaires by the end of the month!”

And with their little party plan, the demonic duo flew into another random house and spent the rest of the day trying every kinky thing the two could dream of with their abilities. Trust me, this writer would be here for hours trying to explain it all so get your mind in the gutter!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night full of Rule 34 and badass action! Tune in next time to see the duo and their new skills demolish more strongholds! Thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> And I am already having a blast writing this. Hope you all enjoyed this too!


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